


Disillusioned

by love_u_always_mom



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 04:47:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 39,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3637257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_u_always_mom/pseuds/love_u_always_mom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carlisle comes back to check on Bella four months after they left. What will he find when he sees what their leaving has done to Bella? What happens when Billy gets sick of Charlie's acceptance and nudges him toward the truth? Rated MA for language and explicit sexual content. No readers under 18 years of age. This is a Bellisle (BellaXCarlisle) fic. Don't like the pairing, don't read. If you recognize it, it's not mine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I know that Billy is a bit OOC, but I just follow the characters.
> 
> I do not own anything but my own plot. If you recognize it, then it does not belong to me.
> 
> Without further ado, I bring you 'Disillusioned'.

Carlisle sighed as he parked in front of the Swan house in late January, four months after his family had left Forks behind. He had reluctantly followed Edward away from Forks, along with the rest of his family, but his heart ached for Bella. When Alice had told him that he needed to come back, he hadn't hesitated.

The cruiser was in front of the house, but the truck wasn't, which was probably best. Bella would try to hide things, and he needed to get the truth. His interactions with the Chief were limited, but he knew that Charlie was a smart man.

In a flash, Carlisle darted to the door and knocked, listening to Charlie's footsteps as he walked to the door. When the door opened, he could see the look of surprise on his face. Clearly, Carlisle was the last person he expected.

"Doctor Cullen, what can I do for you?" He asked warily.

Carlisle felt a tinge of regret. Clearly, Bella wasn't doing well if Charlie was taking that tone. It spoke of subtle resentment, though the man would never show it outright. "I was hoping to talk to you about Bella, see how she's doing." Charlie scrubbed his face with his hand, his expression saying more than words ever could. Silently, he turned and walked back into the house, leaving the door open in invitation.

He followed the Chief into the house, closing the door quietly behind him as he took the indicated seat on the couch, watching as Charlie took the recliner. Carlisle waited patiently, knowing that Charlie would speak in due time. After a couple moments, he did.

"I'm lost," he began softly. "She's just a shell, I've never seen anything like it. She doesn't eat, she barely sleeps. When she does she wakes up screaming at least twice a night. She's lost a lot of weight, for her anyway. She tries to hide it, and the other day I got fed up and told her I was sending her to her mom in Jacksonville. That seemed like it got her attention, and she went out with the Stanley girl that night, but she's still not functioning. I can tell it's just a façade, trying to placate me." Charlie heaved a deep sigh. "I don't know what to do for her anymore, Carlisle."

Carlisle felt his heart break, listening to Bella's father talk. He had known it would be bad, but even he hadn't expected something like this. "I knew it was a mistake," he said sadly. "I told Edward that, but he was adamant. Said he didn't want to do the whole long distance relationship thing, and nothing Esme or I said would convince him. He was going on about a 'clean break' and how she would get over him. I told him that's not the type of person she was, but he's a teenager. You know how they are," Carlisle said wearily.

Charlie chuckled humorlessly at that. "Yeah, I do. Bells is as stubborn as they come, I'll tell you that."

Carlisle couldn't help but laugh. "I noticed." The two sat in silence for a minute, and Carlisle could hear Bella's truck now, still a mile or so away.

When she was a couple blocks away, Charlie tilted his head slightly. "There's Bella," he said evenly. Suddenly, he shot Carlisle a look. "I'm not sure how she'll react to seeing you," he said nervously.

Carlisle shrugged. "I'm sure she'll be emotional, but that's understandable."

They were silent as they listened to the truck come to a stop and turn off outside the house, and Carlisle listened carefully as she walked up to the house. Her breathing was normal, but her steps were slow and her heart rate was elevated, indicating that she was weak, and her heart itself didn't sound nearly as strong as it once had. The front door opened, and they waited impatiently as she made her way slowly through the kitchen, staring at the floor.

When he looked up at her, he felt his jaw drop. For all that he had expected, even after talking to Charlie, this was so much worse than he had been prepared for. For the first time since he turned, Carlisle cursed his perfect vision. He didn't want to see the minute details that Charlie couldn't. He could see how weak her heart was by watching her pulse beat in her neck, not moving the skin as much as it should. Her skin had lost it's shine, a detail that most humans wouldn't see, but to him the difference in her skin stood out the way it would to her if he stepped into the sun without any effect at all. She looked exhausted, with his sharp eyes he could see that the bags under her eyes literally had bags of their own, the darkness under them reminded him of his own eyes.

What was the worst, though, was how skinny she was. He could clearly see the contours of her bones beneath her skin, could clearly perceive the way her clothes hung on her bony frame. The girl had lost at least thirty pounds, and he could see the diminished muscles where her body had begun to use it as a fuel source to keep itself going. Even though Charlie didn't have the senses to pick it up, one thing was horrifyingly obvious to Carlisle. Bella was well into the slow stages of death.

Before he quite knew what he was doing, Carlisle stood up. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Charlie start, and realized he had moved much too fast. Right then, however, Carlisle couldn't find it in himself to care. Still, Bella hadn't noticed him.

"Bella, what have we done to you?" Carlisle said softly.

Finally, she looked up, and in the moments before recognition took over, he saw how dull and completely lifeless her eyes were. He saw the exact moment when she recognized him, and waited what seemed like a long time before she decided he was really there in front of her. She took a couple steps forward.

"Carlisle?" She whispered softly.

"It's me, Bella." She reached out tentatively, brushing her fingers against his shoulder, clearly wondering if she was imagining him. When she realized she wasn't dreaming or hallucinating, she launched herself at him with a cry, wrapping her skinny arms around his neck like a vice. Carlisle caught her, and wrapped his arms around her tiny frame as he felt her begin to cry into his shoulder, hot tears soaking the fabric of his coat.

In one smooth motion, he bent down and scooped her up, before walking over to the couch and settling her on his lap. He could feel her shoulders heaving, and after several moments her fingers began to scrabble against the zipper of his coat. For a moment Carlisle was confused, but then realized that she must be seeking the familiar sensation of his cold, hard skin, and quickly unzipped his coat. Sure enough, Bella immediately curled against his cold chest, winding her arms tightly around his waist as though afraid he would disappear.

"Bells..." Charlie began, clearly intending to chastise her, but Carlisle waved him off. Bella needed this, and he had no problems being the one to comfort her. Charlie still looked slightly embarrassed at Bella's behavior, but stayed silent. At the moment, Charlie was the least of his worries anyway. His concern right now was for the young woman currently in his arms, whose sobs had finally turned to gasps. One hand made circles on her back while the other gently stroked her hair, doing his best to soothe her.

Ten minutes later, he heard her heartbeat and breathing change as she fell asleep, still curled up in his lap. He felt his lips curve up slightly in amusement, and looked up at Charlie. He gave Carlisle a look of surprise.

"Wait, is she asleep?" Charlie asked in disbelief.

"Just fell asleep, I heard her breathing change."

"Wow. You've got good ears, doc." Carlisle chuckled lightly. With her face that close to his ear, he could pass it off as human level hearing to notice her breathing change.

"So I've heard. Does she normally have trouble falling asleep or just a lot of nightmares?"

"Both," Charlie said sadly. "I hear her tossing and turning for hours, she'll be asleep for maybe an hour and then the screaming starts. Normally happens two or three times a night."

Carlisle looked down at Bella sadly. "I told him..." He whispered, threading his fingers through Bella's hair as she slipped deeper into sleep.

Charlie was looking at Bella carefully. "She's been out five minutes and I can already tell she's sleeping better than she has since he left," he muttered.

"Would you mind if I stayed until she wakes up? If she hasn't been sleeping then I'd hate to wake her," Carlisle said.

"If it means she gets the sleep she needs, you can stay as long as you want," Charlie told him. "On one condition," he said seriously. Carlisle raised his eyebrows in question. "Make sure she eats?" He pleaded.

"Of course, Chief Swan. I'll make sure she does." Carlisle slipped his shoes off and gently shifted so he was laying down on the couch, with Bella laying down on top of him, head resting on his hard chest. Charlie heaved himself out of the armchair and disappeared down the hall, coming back moments with a blanket that he threw over them.

"Couple of guys from the res were gonna come down, but I think I'll call and tell them I'm coming up there instead..." Charlie trailed off, wandering in the direction of the phone. Charlie looked back over his shoulder as he grabbed the phone. "And it's Charlie, not Chief Swan." Carlisle chuckled.

Just then, a car pulled into the driveway, making Charlie turn around and swear to himself.

"I don't have any problems with them," Carlisle said evenly.

"You're not the one I'm worried about," Charlie muttered bitterly. "Ridiculous prejudices..." Carlisle could hear Charlie muttering to himself as he went outside to meet Harry and Billy, who were both staring at his car with contempt.

"I was just gonna call," Charlie told them. "Figured I'd come up to the reservation instead, seeing as Doctor Cullen dropped by."

He saw Billy and Harry glance at each other briefly. "Just the doctor?" Harry asked Charlie.

"Just Carlisle, yeah. Why?"

Billy and Harry looked at each other once more, clearly in silent conversation. "He isn't the one I have problems with," Harry said slowly. "At least not as much as the rest." Billy nodded in agreement, and looked back to Charlie.

"We'll be civil," Billy said evenly. Charlie gave them both a suspicious look before nodding his consent.

"Fair enough. Just so you know, I know the situation looks... compromising, but it's the first time she's slept properly since September, so I'm not gonna complain."

Harry and Billy both gave him strange looks, but followed him into the house nonetheless. On his way through the kitchen Charlie grabbed one of the chairs and set it next to the recliner. Carlisle turned his head and held out his hand to greet the newcomers, his manners overriding the dislike he knew they held for him.

Both men took turns grasping his hand briefly, much to Charlie's surprise.

"Carlisle," Billy said evenly.

"Billy," he returned. "Harry. How are you today?"

"Well enough," Harry returned. "Yourself?"

"I'm ali- I'm here," Carlisle said, changing his mind mid sentence, knowing they would scorn his usual response.

"What brings you back to Forks?" Billy asked, somewhat sharper than was necessary, but Carlisle overlooked it.

"I was in Seattle for a medical conference and wanted to check in and see how Bella was doing." He paused, unable to help the frown as he looked down at her tiny form. "I'm glad I decided to stop by. If Charlie doesn't object I'd like to look after her for a while, make sure she puts on some weight." Carlisle glanced at Charlie then, who nodded.

"That would be great actually. She's gotten so skinny."

"I'd like to see her up over a hundred before I leave," he told Charlie honestly. "I'd peg her at about eighty, eighty-five right now."

Billy looked up at Harry then. "We'll have to tell Sam to pull the guys back a bit."

Carlisle realized he spoke of the wolves, and interjected. "That won't be necessary, so long as they know it's me. Alice might visit, but I'm not expecting anyone else."

Billy looked at him warily, seeming slightly surprised. "And there won't be any..." he glanced at Charlie briefly. "Conflict?" Carlisle took this to mean hunting, and responded as such.

"We prefer to go a couple hours when we're out camping," he said meaningfully. "No use in your own backyard."

The pair of Quileutes looked to each other, before Harry responded. "Fair enough."

Charlie watched the conversation with confusion clear on his face, before shrugging it off.

Carlisle sat, or rather laid, by silently as Charlie and his Quileute friends watched a few football games, not keeping much of an eye on any of it. He was far more focused on Bella, who was still out cold on his chest nearly 6 hours later. Carlisle relaxed and closed his eyes, deciding to feign sleep for Charlie's sake. Now he thought about it, he had no idea if the other two men knew the technicalities of vampirism.

"So how did that happen?" came Billy's voice about ten minutes later. Carlisle presumed he meant Bella sleeping on his chest, and wasn't wrong.

"She came in, saw him and damn near launched herself at him. I was gonna tell her to cool it, but he didn't seem to mind. I'll be the first to admit she needed it, but it took me by surprise, I'll admit." Charlie paused before going on, his tone rather grudging. "But hey, if it means she actually sleeps then I'm all for it. She hasn't slept like this since before they left."

Carlisle heard one of them sigh. Billy, he thought. Harry didn't seem to be quite as vocal about them. It made sense, Billy was Ephraim's heir. "I'm not so sure Charlie," Billy began. Charlie sucked in a breath, but Billy cut him off. "Hear me out Charlie, please. I know you don't like it and I'm bound to silence where the details are concerned, but I will tell you that their… group, is bad news. Maybe not the Cullens themselves, for the most part, but others… like them, are not people you want to mix with. And being too involved with the Cullens will surely bring others like them straight to you."

Charlie sighed heavily. "There's something strange about them Billy, there's no denying that. Anyone paying attention can see they're not quite human. I don't know what's up with them and I'm not sure I want to, but I know what they've done for my daughter. Most of them at least. I'm not happy with what Edward did but neither is he," Charlie stated. Carlisle had stopped breathing entirely, frozen as he listened to Charlie speak. If his heart could still beat, it would be pounding it's way out of his chest right now. "He means to take care of Bella, and she showed more emotion in ten minutes today than she has in months. I listen to her scream in her sleep every night, only to wake up and watch her push food around her plate and refuse to actually eat anything. Then he comes here today and she comes back to life, so to speak. Now she's slept longer since he's been here holding her like that than she has in the last week. Do you honestly expect me to rip that away from her?"

Carlisle heard another sigh, Harry this time. He heard movement, but no one spoke and he didn't dare open his eyes to see what was going on. He heard Charlie walk to the kitchen, pick something up, come back and hand it to Billy. Next, there was the scratch of pen on paper, followed by a grunt and Charlie leaving the room once again. When Charlie was out of earshot, Harry spoke. "Billy, what the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Helping him pull his head out of his ass. He can tell for himself they're not human and he still doesn't have the sense to keep himself and Bella away from them."

"This violates the treaty and you know it," Harry said sharply.

"Not as long as we don't tell him what they are it doesn't."

Harry sighed deeply, sounding annoyed. "You're a fool, Billy. This is crossing the line."

"Well at any rate it's too late now. He's got the suggestion and he'll go with it no matter what we say."

"You should have asked me before you told him to do that."

Carlisle listened intently to footsteps going up the stairs, the sound of Charlie rummaging in the bathroom cabinet for something and a sound of victory. The footsteps came back down the stairs and Charlie came to stand next to where Carlisle laid on the couch.

Carlisle had no idea what was transpiring between the three men in the room, and it terrified him. He knew that they couldn't flat out expose what he truly was, it would violate the treaty in a way they weren't willing to do. They could, however, do something to make Charlie afraid of him, which he was quite sure was happening around him. It took every bit of willpower he had to continue to feign sleep, because he needed to know what the two men were trying to show Charlie, and also because he couldn't expose the fact that he had been listening to them. Edward was more annoyed by his gift than anything and Carlisle knew that, but right now he would kill, maybe literally, to have the same gift.

Charlie shifted his weight, and Carlisle felt the heat from his skin as Charlie gently grasped Bella's arm and moved it gingerly to her side. Carlisle was positively dying to know what was going on and what Charlie was about to do, but he was drawing a complete and total blank. And by the time he figured out what was going on and had a chance to stop it, it was too late. Charlie had already pressed the metal disc of the stethoscope to his chest. Directly above his silent heart.


	2. Chapter 2

Carlisle very nearly knocked Charlie's hand away, but the damage was already done. He could have stopped it before Charlie had a chance to comprehend what he heard, or rather what he didn't hear, but it would have been just as suspicious. Therefore, he laid perfectly still as he heard Charlie's breath stop and his heart rate increase as he searched for Carlisle's heartbeat. Carlisle could tell when Charlie admitted defeat, because the Chief's heart rate climbed exponentially.

"What the hell is going on here?" He asked sharply. "This is some damned mistake, this thing isn't working properly!" Charlie's voice shook in fear.

"So use it on yourself, or me or Harry here," Billy said evenly. Carlisle could hear when Charlie did just that, feeling an unusual anger flooding him at their foolishness.

"No," Charlie said softly. "No, this can't be right."

Billy sighed again, sympathetically, it sounded like. "I'm sorry Charlie."

"I want to know what the hell is going on around here!" Charlie shouted. Finally, Carlisle could no longer feign sleep. Charlie's heart rate was nearing the danger zone, and he could hear the strain against the walls of his blood vessels as his blood pressure increased. Carlisle's eyes snapped open, and in one smooth motion he extracted himself from Bella's arms and stood, effectively scaring the hell out of all three men.

Charlie was giving him a look that suggested he was completely and totally lost, but Carlisle's eyes were for the two Quileute men. "I would suggest you leave while I do damage control," he said in a whisper laced with fury.

"He deserves to know something's up," Billy said. "He wouldn't listen to us, so something had to be done."

"And you couldn't just leave it be? You couldn't just listen to him and let him stay in the dark? Do you realize what the consequences of this could be? It's dangerous enough that Bella figured it out, at least she can handle the truth. Did you think for a moment what it would do to him?" Carlisle was struggling to keep his voice low, to keep from waking Bella from the first good sleep she had had in months. "I know you don't trust me or the rest of my family, but twisting your way around the treaty is the most foolish thing you've ever done. And if he figures out the truth and it gets back to the people we answer to, that's his life."

Billy finally had the good grace to look ashamed of himself. Clearly he hadn't thought beyond showing Charlie something was up. "Come on Billy, let's get out of here. I told you you were being a damn fool and you didn't listen." Harry looked to Carlisle next. "I'm sorry, I didn't know he was gonna suggest that until it was too late." Carlisle nodded, still too angry to speak.

"This changes things Billy," he said in a low voice. Billy nodded in a resigned way. Clearly, he knew now he should never have done it, but it was far too late for that. The two men left the house without another word, with Charlie watching them the whole way. When the car pulled away, Charlie turned back to stare at Carlisle, distrust in every line of his face.

Carlisle fought his anger, knowing that none of it was Charlie's fault. "I'm sorry about that, and I'm sorry that you got dragged into this," he said wearily. "I don't know where to start."

"Why don't you start by explaining why you don't have a fucking heartbeat!" Charlie shouted. Carlisle winced and lifted a finger to his lips, but it was too late. Bella stirred with a groan, opening her eyes and staring between Charlie's frightened expression and Carlisle's tired one. When her eyes fell on the stethoscope still in Charlie's right hand, comprehension dawned on her face.

"What's going on?" She asked sharply.

Carlisle opened his mouth to explain, but Charlie beat her to it. "Billy and Harry were over. Billy suggested I listen to Carlisle's heart while he was over here sleeping," he said. Bella's brow rose and her hand covered her eyes.

"Dad calm down, it's alright."

"How the hell is it alright?" He shouted. "He doesn't have a pulse! That is not alright Bella!"

"Charlie please try to calm down," Carlisle interjected. "Your heart is going way too fast and if it doesn't slow down you're going to go into cardiac arrest." Charlie gave him a truly bewildered look, and Carlisle belatedly realized his mistake. "Don't ask, just try to calm down. I know you're scared and confused, but that can wait."

"And how the hell am I supposed to manage that?"

Carlisle exaggerated his own breathing, setting a slow pace and motioning for Charlie to imitate him. Giving him a look of deep distrust, Charlie did as he was bade. Slowly, the man's heartbeat began to slow, but Carlisle could tell his blood pressure was still elevated to dangerous levels.

"Please sit, Charlie, you're still in danger of a heart attack or a stroke. I'm not going to lie to you and say I can explain. I can't, but I can tell you that everything you've always said is true."

Charlie gave him a confused look as he slowly sat back down in his chair. The man had been a police officer for two decades, and had clearly perfected his protocol for dealing with things.

Carlisle sat down next to Bella, struggling to find a place to start. "I can't tell you much, but I promise you that I won't lie to you. Is that agreeable?"

Charlie deliberated for several long moments before nodding slowly. "So what can you tell me?"

"That my work is my passion, my reason for existing. My purpose and my only desire in this life has always been to help people. Working in medicine, improving and saving lives, brings me great joy. Giving in to… my nature, shall we say, would be far easier for me. Almost all of those like me do that, without a second thought. But it was never an option for me, and I've fought against it my whole existence."

He could see Charlie nodding slowly, and he was glad. He knew Charlie was an intelligent man, and he had also formed conclusions about Carlisle and the rest of his family long before this. Changing them now would be hard. "Okay," he said warily. His attention shifted, "Bella, what do you know about all of this?"

Bella answered without hesitating. "I know that Carlisle is the most selfless person I've ever met. I know he spent a long time fighting who he is, because he refused to give in. And I know that whatever he thinks," Bella said seriously as her gaze shifted to fall on him, "that he isn't damned."

Carlisle couldn't help but smile gently. "Thank you Bella. As I've said before, you've always been very gracious about us." Bella shrugged as though it weren't a big deal. And to her, he knew it wasn't.

"They're good people, dad. Really. You can't know, I wasn't ever supposed to. It's too dangerous," she said softly. Charlie stared at her intently, clearly fighting with himself.

"If it's dangerous then you shouldn't be involved either," Charlie said.

"Why do you think Edward left me?" She retorted sadly. Charlie looked stricken, clearly he hadn't thought of that, and looked to Carlisle for confirmation. He nodded in agreement.

"It's true. He didn't want her in danger any more, so he made up his mind that we needed to leave. I didn't want to, but he had a good enough point that it was worth trying. Obviously it didn't work out so well," he said sadly.

Bella nodded. "I'll say. Danger magnet, remember?" Carlisle's lips quirked up as Charlie watched them in confusion. "Inside joke," Bella told him with a grin.

Charlie was obviously thinking long and hard, eyes flicking between himself and Bella, though he watched Bella far more closely. Finally, he sighed in resignation. "As much as I want to keep you away Bells, I can't deny what's right in front of me. You've been more lively since you got home today than the last few months combined." His attention shifted to Carlisle. "Just make sure you do your damndest to keep her safe," he said seriously. "I don't know what the hell you are and I sure as hell don't like the fact that you don't have a pulse, but I've known you for a few years now. You've always struck me as a good man, and I believe what you said earlier. Against my better judgement, I'm going to trust you Carlisle." His voice was deadly serious, and Carlisle took him at his word.

"I will protect your daughter with my life, Chief Swan. That I swear." Charlie stood, and Carlisle followed suit. After several moments' hesitation, they shook hands firmly.

Charlie's eyes shifted to Bella then. "What have you gotten yourself into Bells?" He asked tiredly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there's some OOC stuff going on, but I've always wanted to see a good fic where Charlie finds out the truth, and I never did so I resolved to write one and hope it was good. I know there's no Bella in this chapter, but where the plot bunnies lead, I follow.
> 
> Enjoy, and when you've finished do me a wonderful favor and drop me a line and tell me what you thought! Remember, if you recognize it, it's not mine.

Charlie rolled over once more, trying in vain to fall asleep after the events of the day. Or more accurately, the afternoon. As far as he knew, Bella had gone up to bed and Carlisle was in the house, doing God knew what. Could someone without a heartbeat sleep? Eat? He sure as hell didn't know, and wasn't entirely sure he wanted to.

No, he thought wearily, that was a lie. He was a cop, so he was inquisitive by nature. Technically, it meant that he couldn't be alive. To be alive you had to have a heartbeat, that's just how things worked. Which meant that Carlisle, and the rest of his family for that matter, were technically dead. But yet they very obviously weren't. So the Cullens were dead, but not dead. His head throbbed viciously at the idea.

Slowly, his last thought went through his mind again. Dead, but not dead. Dead, but not... dead... His eyes grew wide in the darkness as his blood ran cold and his heart skipped a beat. Undead... Almost immediately his brain went into cop mode as he analyzed everything he could about them. First and foremost, no heartbeat. That was a given. Next on his list was the ice cold skin, astoundingly strong senses, followed by the fact that he never actually saw any of them eat anything. And there was something else niggling at the back of his mind, something obvious. He groaned and rolled over, trying to place what his subconscious was trying to tell him.

He thought back to the conversation between Billy, Harry and Carlisle earlier in the day, he knew it had something to do with something there. He skipped quickly over the parts of the conversation he hadn't understood to the part he almost got, the camping trips. The Cullens were well known for going camping whenever the weather was nice...

His breath stopped as he made the final connection, the one that had been sitting in the back of his mind. Not once had he seen any of them in the sunlight.

"Jesus fucking Christ," Charlie muttered to himself. "I need a goddamn drink." Wearily he dragged himself out of bed and wandered down to the kitchen, opening the fridge and grabbing two beers straight away. When he turned around, Carlisle had appeared in the doorway, making him jump in surprise.

Charlie's manners were automatic. "Want one?" He asked, holding out one of the bottles.

"I'm good, thank you though," Carlisle said courteously.

Charlie knew that Bella's sense of humor could be downright sarcastic when she was overwhelmed and uncomfortable, it was her way of dealing with things she wasn't sure how to handle. It was a trait she had gotten from Charlie. "Grab a knife and a glass and help yourself, doc," he muttered, dropping his arm wrist up on the table as he plopped down.

He saw Carlisle's easygoing grin vanish instantly as he froze. The eyes that regarded him were not those of the friendly town doctor he had come to know and respect, but those of a predator. A predator so feared they lived on in myth and legend even though no one had believed in them for hundreds of years. Charlie couldn't help the chill that shot down his spine.

"How?" Carlisle asked softly. Charlie knew what he was asking.

"You don't have a heartbeat, but you're walking and talking and everything like you do. So you're technically dead, but you're not. Which makes you undead, does it not? I'm a cop, Carlisle. Putting things together like that is my job."

Carlisle nodded in agreement. "I suppose that's true," he allowed, taking the open seat across the table from Charlie. "But knowing we exist could mean your life, Charlie," Carlisle told him seriously. Charlie nodded, it made sense.

"I figured as much. That's why no one actually knows, isn't it?"

Carlisle chuckled. "You're quick."

"It's my job to be quick," Charlie told him. "And to get that job, I had to take an oath that included swearing to give my life, if it was required of me."

"So tell me," Charlie continued after a few minutes. "How old are you?"

Carlisle laughed aloud. "From what I understand that's the first question Bella asked too." Charlie grinned slightly, waiting for the answer. "I'm twenty-three," Carlisle said evenly.

Charlie nodded along. "You look twenty-three." He thought for a moment. "When were you born?"

Carlisle laughed again. "Sixteen-forty," he said evenly.

Charlie choked on the sip of beer he had just taken. "You're shitting me."

"Afraid not Charlie," Carlisle answered.

Charlie detected a subtle undertone in Carlisle's voice, something that spoke of sadness or regret. "So how…" Charlie trailed off, but Carlisle caught his drift.

"My father was a priest, in London in the early seventeenth century," Carlisle began. Charlie couldn't help the mild surprise at the irony of the idea. "Back then there were raids done by mobs and priests, churches and the like for witches, werewolves and vampires. When I was twenty or so, my father's health began to decline and he put me in charge of the hunts. I didn't necessarily want to be, I had always hated violence, but there wasn't really a choice in the matter. I wasn't the type to see these creatures where there were none and I faced a significant amount of scorn for it. Many innocent people burned at the hands of my father and those like him, you see.

"I was quiet about it though, and careful. Soon enough I discovered a coven of true vampires living in the sewers beneath London. Naturally, the mob gathered with their torches and pitchforks, the stereotypical things, and we went to drive them out. The one that emerged began to flee, but was obviously starving and hadn't fed in a very long time. So instead of following the instinct of self preservation, he turned and attacked."

"Why not run off until he was safe, and… er, feed… then, when he was safe?" Charlie asked slowly. The idea was foreign to him and he couldn't deny that the whole thing made him uncomfortable, but now he had that driving need to know and understand.

"It's called bloodlust for a reason," Carlisle explained. "The urge is driving at best, but the longer it's been, the harder it is to resist. Eventually, the time comes when you attack without conscious thought. You smell the blood and the instinct takes over your mind, wipes away everything else." Charlie shuddered, he knew that Carlisle must speak from experience. "He fell upon me first, but before he could finish me off he ended up needing to defend himself. Eventually he fled, the group I had brought following him.

"The transformation is painful beyond anything you could begin to comprehend. By some miracle I had enough sense to drag myself to a dumpster, hide among the garbage until the venom finished it's work." Carlisle sighed, he hated reliving these memories. "When I realized what I had become, I was horrified. I tried everything I could think of to kill myself, but what I didn't know at the time is that we are nearly impossible to destroy. Finally I relented, and hid myself deep in the wilderness to starve to death. Eventually, I figured it had to happen. The worse the thirst got, the farther I fled from humanity. I knew that if someone were to stumble upon me, I would attack without thinking and the idea of taking another human life was unbearable, even with the pain I was in as I starved."

There was a profoundly haunted look in Carlisle's eyes, and Charlie couldn't help the sympathy he felt at the man sitting before him. He nearly told Carlisle that he didn't have to relive all of this, but his curiosity was burning now.

"One day a herd of deer wandered past my hiding place. Instinct took over and I attacked without thinking, so desperate for sustenance as I was. When I came back to myself, I found my strength and sanity had returned, along with four drained bucks at my feet." He smiled wryly before continuing. "Never again did I attempt to starve myself. Though all human bodily functions cease, that does not mean that we cannot feel over full. I glutted myself so severely that day that I nearly threw up, which is not normal for our kind. I realized that I could live on the blood of animals, just as I had lived on their meat in my human life.

"I returned to society and used the extra time and infallible memory to study the subjects I had always wanted to, before finally settling on medicine. It had been my desire from the beginning to help others, and I discovered that that desire did not disappear after my transformation. It took years upon years of incredible effort, but at long last I managed to gain complete control over my desire for human blood without ever having tasted it."

Charlie sat in astounded silence when Carlisle finished his tale. The effort he put in to fight his own nature was nothing short of incredible, and he found that his respect for the man had increased greatly. He chuckled at the irony of the idea, and Carlisle gave him a questioning look.

"I find out you're a fucking vampire, of all things, and instead of afraid like I know I should be I'm just impressed." He shook his head. "Figures, I guess. So what about the others?"

"Everyone other than Alice and Jasper, I changed myself. Our existence is often a very lonely one, and after about a quarter of a century I was struck by the same desire for companionship as most of my kind. I met others, but none whom shared my philosophy or my aversion to my 'natural food source' as one such acquaintance phrased it. When a century and a half went by without finding anyone who shared my ideals, I began to consider creating myself a companion and teaching them my way of life. I was torn, however, between my own selfish desires and the idea of cursing someone else to this existence. I didn't want to take someone else's choice from them in the prime of their life, the way mine had been.

"It was in Chicago, in nineteen-eighteen that I met a woman by the name of Elizabeth Masen and her seventeen-year-old son Edward, both dying of Spanish Influenza."

Charlie's eyebrows rose and his jaw dropped slightly as he realized where the story was going. "Her husband, Edward Senior had been killed in the first waves of the disease, and Elizabeth and her son weren't far behind. I was with her in her last moments of lucidity, and she begged me to save her son. I assured her I would do my best, but then she said something that still chills me." Charlie stared at him, and Carlisle quoted, "You must do everything in your power. What others cannot do, that is what you must do for my Edward."

"Minutes later she lost consciousness, and died hours after. When I did my rounds and came to Edward, I could see that he wouldn't last the night without my intervention. There was so much death, so many dying and so few to help that no one noticed when I carried him out the back door, across the rooftops to my home where I changed him."

Charlie kept expecting to get used to the things he was being told, but each time he thought he was getting there something new struck him dumb. "When was he born?"

"He was born Edward Anthony Masen, to Elizabeth and Edward Masen on June 20th, nineteen-oh-one."

Charlie shook his head in bewilderment, hardly able to wrap his brain around what he was being told.

"I really shouldn't be telling you this," Carlisle told him quietly. "If anyone finds out, you will be given two options."

"Join or die, right?"

"Yes."

Charlie shrugged. On one hand, it was eerie and frightening. It certainly changed his view of the world, and everything in it. On the other, he had always wondered about the old stories and myths. Almost all myth was based in fact somewhere, and who were they to assume they knew everything? He shook himself mentally, trying to clear his head. Vampires were real, and his daughter's ex-boyfriend was older than his own grandfather. It had been a very strange day.


	4. Chapter 4

After about five minutes of silence, Charlie looked at the clock on the wall, then heaved himself up from the chair. "She said she was going to bed about three and a half hours ago, so if I'm right she's gonna start screaming any minute now," Charlie muttered resignedly.

Carlisle wasn't sure if he should focus on being impressed or sad, he had plenty of room in his mind to feel both at the same time. He followed Charlie up the stairs to Bella's room, listening to her slow, steady heartbeat. He could tell that she was asleep, but not dreaming as of yet, and said so as Charlie leaned against the wall outside her bedroom door.

"How can you tell?"

"Her heartbeat," Carlisle replied. "It's slow enough that she's obviously sleeping, but not fast or erratic like it would be if she were dreaming, especially if it were a nightmare." Just as he stopped speaking, Bella's heart rate began to pick up. "And there it goes," he said.

Charlie nodded, looking resigned, and opened the door to see Bella grimacing, muttering brokenly and whimpering. Carlisle beat Charlie to the bed and gently rested his hand on her forehead, wondering if the familiar sensation of his skin would calm her. After several long moments, her face relaxed and her heart began to slow down. Carlisle smiled sadly.

"How'd you do that?" Charlie asked in wonder. "I can't get her to calm down without waking her up."

"I'm assuming her nightmares are about Edward?" Carlisle inquired. Charlie nodded. "Obviously, the feel of our skin is unique, particularly the temperature. I thought that by touching her, it would fool her subconscious mind into thinking that Edward was here with her."

"That makes sense, I guess…" Charlie trailed off, looking slightly uncomfortable.

"I know it's a lot to take in Charlie. I'm sorry you had to learn all of this."

"I can't decide if I am or not," Charlie said honestly. "On one hand it's hard to wrap my mind around and it's freaky as hell, but on the other hand, I like knowing things. I like knowing the truth." He shook his head wearily. "I just don't know right now."

"Why don't you get some rest? I'll look after her for you, make sure she sleeps properly and eats in the morning." Charlie nodded and turned around, ready to leave. "Actually, if it's okay with you I'd like to keep her from school for tomorrow, possibly take her back to the house and give her a proper exam and give her a chance to relax. I'm sure my showing up out of nowhere is going to jar her a bit."

"Yeah, that's fine. I'll call the school before I leave for work then, let them know she's gonna be out." He paused for a second, looking both unsure and uncomfortable. Carlisle waited patiently for him to speak. "You're welcome to the couch if you, uh, want to rest or anything." Charlie scratched his head, clearly unsure.

"No need Charlie, but thank you for the offer."

Charlie sighed again, looking as though he was debating asking something else. "Ask anything you wish to know. I can't promise an answer, but I won't lie to you."

"I guess I'm just wondering about the specifics. Your limitations or whatever. Like sleeping, eating, that kind of thing. What's the deal?"

"We don't eat regular food, although you've probably noticed that. If we do end up eating human food, to save face, it stays in our stomach until we have a chance to vomit it back up, as we don't have a functioning digestive system. We don't sleep, and have no need for oxygen. We breathe to smell and to speak, but it's not technically necessary. Sunlight causes us no harm, but we avoid it due to the fact that it makes us very… conspicuous, shall we say?" Charlie nodded, looking too tired to really be surprised any more. "At any rate, I can see where the burst into flames myth came from," Carlisle said with a grin.

Charlie gave him a confused look, and rubbed his hand across his face.

"That's probably enough information for one day Charlie. I'll still be here tomorrow, get some rest," Carlisle said gently. Charlie nodded in agreement, and walked out, closing the door softly behind him.

Carlisle sighed heavily, and turned to look at Bella. Though the nightmare had passed, she still looked restless. Silently, he toed off his shoes, removed his tie and climbed onto the bed to lay down next to her. In the few moments that he wasn't touching her, however, another nightmare seized her, and she startled awake. He didn't know what the dream had been, but seeing him so close to her obviously disoriented her, and she was breathing quickly and raggedly.

"Bella, Bella, calm down," he soothed. "It's just a dream, I promise. I'm right here." Her eyes locked on his as her breathing and her heart rate began to slow once more. Softly, he lifted a hand and brushed a stray lock of hair out of her face, making her sigh quietly at the contact.

"You're going to be okay Bella," he promised. "I'm going to take care of you."

She regarded him with her deep brown eyes, and before he could make sense of what he might have said wrong, she began to cry.

"Bella!" He exclaimed, "What's wrong?" She shook her head slightly at his question, denying him. Carlisle was baffled, cupping her face in both of his hands and tilting her face to look at him. "What did I say Bella?" He pleaded.

"You're going-" gasp, "to leave me-" gasp, "again," she choked out.

"Breathe Bella," he soothed softly. "Talk to me sweetheart. I never said that."

After sucking in several long, shaky breaths, Bella managed to speak clearly. "You said you're going to take care of me," she said as more tears poured from her eyes.

Carlisle nodded at her, still completely lost. "I am Bella, I swear to you I am."

"You're going to take care of me, and then you're going to leave again," she whispered.

Finally, Carlisle understood. "I'm not leaving you behind again Bella. I'm not going to leave you again, I promise," he whispered fiercely. Her brown eyes regarded him carefully, he could see the mistrust in them. Carlisle slipped his arms around her and pulled her tiny frame flush against his own, holding her tightly and tucking her face into his shoulder. "You're a part of our family, and I'm not going to leave you behind like this ever again. Okay?"

She didn't respond, and he pulled her back enough to be able to look into her eyes once more. "Okay?" He asked once more. She bit her lip, still silent and not sure he meant it. "We need you as much as you need us, Bella."

"Edward doesn't," she whispered softly. The pain in her eyes and her voice was such that if he were standing, he thought it might knock him over. "Edward doesn't want me, he said I'm not good enough for him."

More tears flowed from her eyes as he stared at her in stunned silence. Could Edward have really said that to her? He didn't think so, but the look in her eyes said she wasn't lying. Carlisle tugged her close again, wrapping his arms around her and holding her as tightly as he could without hurting her. "I don't care what Edward said to you, you are a part of this family. Do you understand me?"

He felt her nod against his neck, and took a deep, cleansing breath. He would most certainly have to have a word with Edward at some point, but not in the near future. First, Bella needed him and second, he was too angry. "Oh, my girl," he said sadly. "What have we done to you?"

"It's not your fault," she hiccuped softly. "It's mine. I'm the one that got the papercut, I tore apart your family."

"It's not your fault for bleeding, Bella. You're human, you bleed."

This time it was Bella who pushed away to look at him. She regarded him seriously for a moment before she spoke. "If I asked you to change me, would you?" He furrowed his brow, unsure where she was going with this. "Would you?"

Carlisle thought, before deciding to answer from his heart. "Not right this minute, I wouldn't." He saw her expression, and cut her off. "No, no. Listen to me a moment Bella. Hear me out." At her nod, he went on. "I think you should finish high school, spend more time with your parents and your friends. I think you should spend some more time being human, giving the people that love you memories. And if in say, a year, you still wanted to become one of us, then yes. I would change you without hesitation."

"You promise?" She asked tremulously.

"You have my word, Bella." She stared into his eyes for a long moment, before nodding. "Why do you ask?" He inquired.

"Edward said he wanted me forever, but he never wanted me enough to change me. If he wanted me the way he said he did, he would have wanted to change me." She took several deep breaths, trying to regain her composure. "But he lied," she whispered.

"I can't say, Bella. I honestly can't. I don't know what he was thinking or what he was feeling. What I do know, is that you are a part of my family and I love you very much," he told her sincerely. "And whether it's as a human or a vampire doesn't matter to me. What matters is what you want."

With a shaky sigh, Bella nodded again. Carlisle let out a breath of his own, before pulling her close to him once more. "How is he?" She asked after a moment.

"Edward?"

"Yeah," she said. "How is he doing?"

"I'm not sure," he said honestly. "I haven't seen him in a couple of months."

"Why?" She asked, sounding worried.

"He wanted to do his own thing," Carlisle said softly. "So did Emmett and Rose. Jasper and Alice stayed with me in New York."

He could feel her brow furrow against the skin of his neck. "What about Esme?"

He sighed, pain lancing through his heart. "She went with Edward," he replied. "She's always felt as though Edward is the son she lost while she was human. When Edward left, it put a strain on us. Our love has been… changing, over the last thirty years or so," he said softly. "So when she said she wanted to split up, I was expecting it."

"Oh Carlisle," Bella said softly. "I'm so sorry."

He smiled sadly. "It's okay Bella. It's been coming on for some time. And now I look back on it, I'm not sure we were ever truly in love." Bella's confusion was nearly palpable, and Carlisle didn't even have the empathic abilities that Jasper did. "We never had the passion of Emmett and Rosalie, or Jasper and Alice. We loved each other dearly, and always will. But the space has given us both some perspective. We will always be family, but I think we are better off this way."

He pulled back and looked at her, running his fingers through her hair. "Perhaps one day you will feel the same about Edward," he suggested. She nodded tiredly, more tears slipping from her eyes. He felt bad, but knew she needed to purge herself of the pain before she could truly begin to heal.

This time, she tucked herself into him without his help, wrapping her skinny arms around his waist and cuddling into his chest. He kissed the top of her head affectionately. "Human or vampire, Bella, I love you. Remember that, hmm?" She hummed softly, and succumbed to sleep once more.

Carlisle was aware of the way it made him feel to have her soft, warm body tucked against him the way it was. However, he also had enough room in his mind to shove that knowledge to the back, studiously ignoring the fact that he never wanted to let her out of his embrace.


	5. Chapter 5

Charlie poked his head in the bedroom at seven thirty the next morning, briefly raising his eyebrows at the way Carlisle cradled Bella.

"I called the school. I know you only said today but maybe a few days will do her some good so I told them she'd be out tomorrow and Friday too. You can stay here or she can spend a few days over at your house, whatever works best for you."

Carlisle nodded at him. "Thank you very much Charlie. I think it will do her some good to have some time away. I'm not sure staying at our house will be best for her so if it isn't an inconvenience, I'd like to stay with her here."

"That's no problem at all. I just want her better, whatever it takes," Charlie said softly.

"I'll do everything in my power. I promise you that."

Charlie nodded, he couldn't deny the absolute sincerity in Carlisle's voice. "I appreciate it." Carlisle nodded, and Charlie turned to leave. A couple minutes later, he heard the cruiser pull out of the driveway.

A moment later, his cell phone pinged with a text message from Alice.

_"Remember to keep your head on straight. Focus."_

His brow furrowed as he tried to figure out what she was talking about. He was used to her being cryptic, but it didn't make it any easier to understand what she meant when she was. Shaking his head, Carlisle put his phone down. Just as he did, Bella went into another nightmare, one that seemed more intense than the ones she'd been having through the night.

Almost instantly, her expression screwed up and she started to thrash around. Immediately, Carlisle began to shake her slightly, attempting in vain to wake her up.

Instead of calming her, his touch seemed to scare her, making her lash out at him in her sleep. In a flash, Carlisle did the only thing he could to keep her from hurting herself. He rolled on top of her, pinning her arms and legs to the bed with his own.

She fought his grip, but in vain. With a start, she awoke and stared at him in confusion. It was only when she spoke his name that he realized just how close he was to her soft, warm body, hot breath only inches from his face. He felt himself beginning to lean in, losing focus on...

_"Remember to keep your head on straight. Focus."_

Carlisle took a deep breath to clear his head, feeling a flash of embarrassment at what Alice must have seen to motivate her to send him that text.

"Are you okay now Bella?" Carlisle asked instead.

She nodded slowly, and Carlisle leaned down to kiss her forehead before rolling off her, tugging her into his chest once more with one hand and grabbing his phone with the other. With the same tinge of embarrassment, he responded to Alice.

_"Do I want to know what you saw?"_

Her response came almost immediately.

_"There are times when being blind would be nice. ;)"_

Carlisle knew without a doubt that if he were human, his blush would put Bella to shame.

_"I'm sorry. I don't know what's happening to me."_

_"Jazz and I are happy for you :)"_

Shaking his head at her cryptic nature, he tossed the phone aside and focused on Bella. He was pleased to notice she had fallen asleep once more, her body needed the rest. For the next three hours, Carlisle simply listened to her slow breaths, and the steady beat of her heart. He was pleased, it already sounded significantly stronger than it had the previous day. He tried in vain to tell himself that his happiness had nothing to do with the fact that it was him.

Carlisle mentally shook his head at himself. He was a damned fool. The girl was still torn up over what Edward had done. If he ever had a chance with her, and he told himself quite firmly that he didn't, it wouldn't be for a very long time.

Unfortunately, his mind brought up Alice's last, cryptic text.  _"Jazz and I are happy for you"_. Carlisle tried desperately to tell himself that it didn't mean what he wanted it to, but it wasn't working, and he growled in frustration.

"What's wrong?" Carlisle was surprised to see Bella awake and staring at him in confusion. He gave her a reassuring squeeze.

"Just hate seeing you hurt like this," he told her. It was close enough. Predictably, she blushed at his words. "Come on, lets get you something to eat."

She stretched and sat up, before glancing at her clock. "Oh my God!" She shouted, seeing that it was nearly eleven, and made to fly off to the bathroom, but he grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Charlie called the school, you're out until Monday."

She turned and gave him a confused look. "Why?"

"We thought it would be good for you to have a few days off. He's worried about you Bella. So am I," Carlisle told her softly. She bit her lip and blushed again, looking down. Gently, he used his thumb to pry her lip from between her teeth, tilting her face up to look at him. "What is it?" He asked her gently. She started to shake her head, but he wouldn't let her. "Bella?"

"I feel bad. I'm so weak that you feel like you have to babysit me," she said softly.

"Bella," he said, sitting up and pulling her into his lap, "you are not weak. What he put you through would destroy anyone. Most people would have sought to end their own lives over it, but you found a way to push through."

"Kind of," she said bitterly.

"You're here, aren't you?" He asked.

"Now." He gave her a confused look. "Up until a couple weeks ago I've been kind of... checked out, I guess."

He nodded, it sounded like what Charlie had told him the previous day. "And second off, I am not babysitting you, nor do I feel as though I have to. Someone I care about very deeply is hurting and needs me. And as such, I am taking care of her." He stroked her cheek gently with his thumb. "Alright?" She looked up at him for several long moments, then nodded.

"Good," he said, before standing them both up. "Now, come here," he asked softly, holding his arms out to her. She responded immediately, winding her arms around his waist and laying her head on his chest. Carlisle wrapped his arms around her back tightly, reveling in the feeling of just holding her. She pulled back after a couple minutes, and he took her head in his hands and pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead. "Now, I'll make you something for breakfast while you get ready. How's that sound?" She nodded and smiled at him gratefully, before grabbing a bag and leaving the room.

Carlisle shoved his phone in his pocket before heading down the stairs, thinking heavily about what he was feeling. It was an entirely new sensation, feeling this drawn to her so quickly. With Esme, it had been gradual, taking a couple of years before they both felt the pull. With Bella, it had been a matter of hours and he didn't know what to make of it. Something felt fundamentally right when he held her and kissed her head, when she curled up and rested her head on his chest.

He knew too that it had not been so fast for Edward with her as it was for him now. It had taken Edward weeks to truly feel the draw, and he honestly wondered if he had ever truly been in love with Bella. He knew Bella had been in love with Edward, but perhaps that was simply who she was. He could tell quite clearly that she was a loving person by nature.

Carlisle shook his head wearily. He could tell he was already beginning to fall for her, and it was making him deeply uneasy. He sighed in defeat and dug out his phone, typing out a text to Alice.

_"What is happening to me?"_

Her response came back almost instantly.

_"You're falling in love with her Carlisle."_

_"This will not end well Alice. There is no way that it can."_

_"That's for me to know, and you to find out! :)"_

Carlisle shook his head, unable to help the chuckle that escaped him. Alice would be Alice.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where it becomes M for some sexual themes. Nothing heavy, it's still pretty mild. But I still need to put up that warning. Finally, if you recognize it, it's not mine. Enjoy the next chapter! :)

Carlisle drove them to the old house after she had breakfast.

"What are we doing here?" She asked when they got out of the car.

"I wanted to have a look at you, do a quick exam. It's easier done here than at your house. Not to mention I have plenty of equipment here, should I need it."

"Exam for what?" She asked as they made their way through the house. Bella was surprised, it looked as though they had never left. He led her up to his office as he talked.

"Mainly because of how skinny you are. You've lost far too much weight. I need to see how severe it is and how much damage it may have done. Speaking of, how much do you normally weigh?"

Bella thought for a moment. "One ten or so."

He nodded as they stepped into a room she hadn't been in before, that almost looked like a cramped medical suite. "Well first I'm going to weigh you," he said, gesturing to a scale on the floor. She took of her shoes and coat, and stepped on. After a moment, the scale popped up with a shocking number. Eighty-seven point three.

"Bella you're what, five feet?"

"Yeah," she said softly. "Five feet even."

He shook his head. "That means your BMI is exactly seventeen. That's too low, I want you up to at least nineteen."

"How much do I have to put on?"

"Almost exactly ten pounds," he told her. "Thankfully that's not too bad. I still want to have a look at you though, lay down." He commanded, gesturing to a metal table by the wall. "It won't be comfortable and I'm sorry for that," he told her, laying a couple of plain white hospital blankets down on the cold metal.

She shook her head at him. "It's fine." She hopped up onto the table and his lip quirked up.

"Actually Bella I'm going to need you to take most of your clothes off. Don't worry, you can cover yourself with a couple of sheets, but I'll need you to remove everything but your underwear. Obviously I'm not going to look."

Carlisle could actually feel her blush as it stained her cheeks, and dug a pair of flat sheets from a cabinet, folding them down to appropriate sizes. "When you're done, lay this one across your hips and this one across your breasts." He laid them down on the table and turned his back, listening to the sound of her clothes falling to the floor. He heard the shuffling of sheets, followed by her voice.

"Okay, I'm ready," she said softly. He turned, and couldn't help but be struck by the condition she was in. It made him want to cry, seeing her so unhealthy and knowing he had played a part in it. He couldn't help the fingers that gently stroked across her collarbones and down her too-prominent ribs and protruding hips.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," he whispered. "I should have done something, I should have stopped him."

"Carlisle, it isn't your fault. Not at all, so please don't blame yourself." He could tell she was trying to catch his eye, but the shame burning through him made him deliberately avoid her gaze. Much like himself, she wasn't having it, and took his chin in her hand. If he was determined to avoid her gaze, he could have kept her from moving his face, but he didn't see the purpose. When his eyes met hers, her gaze was stern. "Don't you dare bring this on yourself Carlisle. It isn't your fault. You're the one saving me."

He sighed softly, before nodding resignedly. He wasn't completely convinced, but he would try to be fair to himself, for her sake.

Without another word, his fingers began to drift over her skin, starting at her shoulders and working their way down. As it was closer to his natural speed, she couldn't focus on exactly what he was doing. All she knew was that his sensitive, skilled fingers would not miss a single detail, no matter how fast he worked.

Carlisle was internally cursing his newfound attraction to the young woman as his hands drifted across her skin and down her body. A small part of his brain, perhaps the part that would forever be twenty-three, took notice of the fact that she was very nearly naked under the small strips of sheet that just barely covered her breasts and hips. He could feel the softness of her skin and the warmth, the feel of her blood flowing through her veins serving to arouse him further.

He did his best to work quickly, needing to get it overwith before she noticed anything was amiss. If he had been ashamed before, it was nothing to the way he felt now. Over three hundred years he'd been a doctor and a routine exam was affecting him this way now? He mentally shook his head. Life had a cruel sense of humor, clearly.

He was more than happy to finish, seeing as he had a very awkward erection and desperately wanted to be rid of it, one way or another. Not to mention he clearly needed to give himself a talking to. Reacting the way he was currently was completely inappropriate, no matter who the patient was.

"Well, unless there's anything specific that you're worried about, I'd say you're good to go," he told Bella quickly, more than eager to get out of there. The way her eyes shifted down, however, told him he wasn't going to be so lucky. "Is there something you're concerned about Bella?"

She blushed furiously and nodded. "My, um," she bit her lip momentarily before continuing. "My... breasts... have been sore for a couple of months..." She trailed off, nearly whispering.

Carlisle was glad he had as much practice as he did. It allowed him to act calm and professional, while internally he was panicking somewhat. He was incredibly aroused as it was, he couldn't imagine what a breast exam would do to him. He was, however, the doctor, and she trusted him. With a reassuring smile that he wished someone would turn on him, Carlisle pulled away the sheet covering her breasts.

His first thought was that they were utterly perfect, and he had to forcibly shove the lecherous, horny twenty-three year old in his mental closet and slam the door. Unfortunately, that door didn't lock.

He made even faster work of palpating and prodding her breasts than he did with the rest of her exam, going down his mental checklist as fast as he could. In a flash, he laid the sheet back over her, and saw her visibly relax.

"Nothing abnormal," he told her. "Just some new tissue trying to develop, but being underweight to the degree you are has temporarily stopped the progress, drawing out the pain. Once you put some weight on, that tissue will develop normally, and after that the pain should subside."

She nodded, still looking embarrassed, and Carlisle gave her another reassuring smile. "You can get dressed, there's also a bathroom through the door if you need it. I have a couple things to take care of and then I'll meet you in the living room."

"Okay," she said quickly, obviously eager to put her clothes back on. He nodded and left the room at a human pace, but was in the bathroom on the other side of the house just a breath after he pulled the door closed.

With a groan of profound relief, Carlisle undid his pants and pulled his erection free, wrapping his hand around himself and pumping furiously, well aware that it was the first time he had masturbated in close to ninety years. What was this woman doing to him?


	7. Chapter 7

Carlisle met Bella down in the living room a few minutes later, feeling both relaxed and slightly ashamed of himself. He shoved it down, however, not wanting Bella to notice anything was amiss.

"So, what's the consensus doc?" She asked when he joined her.

"You're lucky," he told her flatly. "No lasting damage, from what I can tell. It looks like you just need to put weight back on." She bowed her head slightly, clearly feeling guilty. "No, Bella, that's not what I mean," he said, pulling her up from the couch. "You can't be blamed. Some people react to trauma by eating far too much, some people react to the exact same thing by not eating at all. It just so happens that you're in the latter group."

Bella still stared downward, unwilling to be convinced by his words. "It's my fault you had to leave in the first place," she said softly. "If I'd been more careful-"

"It doesn't matter how careful you were Bella, at some point you would have ended up bleeding around us. It's not your fault and it's not Jasper's." He cradled her face carefully between his hands, forcing her to look at him as he spoke. "Nothing that has happened is your fault. It has been an unfortunate sequence of events caused by probability and bad luck, nothing more." Carlisle lowered his forehead to rest against hers, staring into her eyes beseechingly. "Please do not blame yourself, Bella," he whispered. "It pains me to hear you do so."

Bella looked as though she had lost her train of thought, and prompted her anxiously. "Promise me Bella?"

Shakily, she nodded her consent, and he wrapped his arms around her tightly, winding one hand into her silky dark hair and lowering his head to her shoulder to inhale the sweet fragrance emanating from the pulse point in her neck. He felt her stiffen and chuckled lightly in response, pulling back to see her startled look. "Just because the scent doesn't tempt me doesn't mean I can't enjoy the sweetness of it," he said with a smile. "Kind of like your kind and food-scented air fresheners. When you burn a candle that smells like sugar cookies, you're not tempted to eat the wax, are you?"

Bella couldn't help but laugh at the analogy. "Yeah, that's true isn't it? I never quite thought of it that way…" she trailed off, struck by the accuracy of the comparison.

"Or better yet, since I've smelled it on you enough," he continued with a grin. "Just because you enjoy the smell of strawberries doesn't mean you're tempted to drink your shampoo, right?" She grinned back at him and nodded. "I like your scent," he said softly. It wasn't until she gave him a mildly surprised look that he realized he had spoken aloud. Carlisle was grateful that he was not human, because if he were the blush would have given him away immediately. As it was, he could play it off, having no body functions to give him away.

…

Bella's intuition flickered at Carlisle's soft declaration. She could tell by the quick shift of his eyes that he hadn't meant to speak his last comment aloud, and she felt quite certain that were he human, he would have been blushing furiously. She did enough of it herself to recognize the signs, such as the minute flick of his eyes to the side, or the twitch of his bottom lip that could only mean he had once been a lip-biter. Incidentally, lip chewing was her go to when she blushed.

She thought back to the last twenty-four hours, startled to realize that's all it had been, and went over their interaction carefully. If she didn't know any better, she would think he loved her. But that wasn't possible, she reasoned to herself. He and Esme had only been separated a month or so, and falling in love took more than a few hours. But the way he held her, talked to her and touched her just didn't line up with her own logic. Maybe it was a vampire thing, she thought carefully. She thought back to the exam he had just given her, and the flash of panic in his eyes when she had stumbled through the mention of her breasts hurting, followed by his abrupt departure when he finished. At the very least, she was quite sure he was uncomfortable around her.

Bella watched him carefully, particularly his eyes, as she asked her question. "Carlisle, do I make you uncomfortable?" She inquired softly. His eyes widened in surprise for the briefest moment, but she was just able to catch it.

"Of course not Bella." She regarded him carefully, chewing over his tone. He sounded surprised at her conclusion, too surprised. What convinced her, though, was the twitch of his bottom lip once more. Yep, definitely a former lip biter.

"Liar," she said bluntly.

Both eyebrows went up momentarily before he answered. "And what makes you say that?" He asked carefully, upper teeth actually scraping his lower lip this time.

"That!" She said, pointing at his mouth. "That right there. You bit your lip as a human, didn't you?" She accused, somewhat playfully.

He chuckled at her then, looking mildly impressed. "Yes I did actually, how did you notice?"

She raised one eyebrow. "You think I wouldn't recognize another lip biter when I saw one? I only do it when I'm embarassed, lying or both. And I have a feeling you are, or were, the same."

Carlisle bowed his head slightly, seeming both embarrassed and amused at being caught. "And you'd be right," he admitted grudgingly.

"So, what am I doing that makes you uncomfortable?" She asked softly, returning the conversation to seriousness. She didn't miss that he was still holding her, or the way his arms tightened when she placed the blame on herself.

"It's nothing you're doing, Bella, I promise you that." She raised one disbelieving eyebrow at him, contradicting his statement. "Honestly," he said, "it isn't anything you're doing. It's…" He trailed off, and she watched the lip twitch again. With a slight smile, she reached up and touched his lower lip in the place it kept twitching toward his teeth. His light gold gaze caught hers, and in the moment before he put up his walls, she saw a look in his eyes she couldn't explain. One that convinced her that impossibly, somehow she was right. If he didn't love her yet, he was headed down that road.

It was completely unconscious when she leaned in, but the next thing she knew, their foreheads were pressed together again. He must have realized that she had figured him out, because his walls were down. The look in his eyes said everything he wouldn't say aloud, including a fair amount of shame. She stroked his cheek gently with her hand, and his eyelids fluttered at the sensation. "I'm sorry Carlisle," she whispered. "It's just too soon."

He smiled at her, somewhat sadly. "I know, Bella. I would never ask such a thing of you. I don't even know what's happening to me," he finished softly, lowering his gaze from hers. She could hear the bitterness and shame coloring his tone, and it tugged at her heart. She couldn't imagine how difficult it must be for him, with the morals he had, to be feeling like this about a woman who had dated someone he considered his son.

The next words out of her mouth burned on the way, but she knew it would hurt ten times more to keep them locked up inside. "If you want some… distance, I understand."

He shook his head as he stroked one hand along her back. "I couldn't even if I wanted to," he whispered, so softly she wasn't sure she was meant to hear. Somehow, impossibly, her world had flipped even more upside-down in the last day than it had already been. All she could do was roll with it, she supposed.

She let her hand drop from his face to wrap around his waist once more, laying her head on his chest. Her heart hurt for him, for how he must be feeling, but her own heart was still broken and she knew better than to accept him now, even with as nice as it felt to be held again. Carlisle deserved to be more than a rebound, and she wasn't going to treat him as one.

…

Carlisle's silent heart seemed to swell when she wrapped her arms around him again, even after he admitted with his silence that he was falling for her. They stood there for several long minutes, and he was content to hold her for as long as she would allow. His eyes itched intensely, nearly a burn, and he fought to keep his breathing steady as he blinked at the uncomfortable sensation. He had never had anything against crying, per se, but the idea that he was on the verge of doing so right now was slightly humiliating. He took a deep breath and released it slowly as he fought to get a handle on his wayward emotions. Somehow, Bella was bringing out more emotion in him in the last twenty four hours than he had felt in the last fifty years, and it scared him.

"I'm sorry, Bella," he said after a long few minutes, "if I've made you uncomfortable. If you wish, I can try to be more…" Carlisle thought, not sure of the word he wanted to use. He never got a chance, however, because she interrupted his thought.

"It's okay Carlisle," she said softly. "It doesn't make me uncomfortable. I'm not sure why," she admitted, "but it doesn't. So please don't feel bad. There are things beyond our control."

He nodded in agreement. "Yes, there are. Still, if I become to forward and you wish me to back off, please don't hesitate to say so." He paused for a moment, looking as though he was debating saying aloud what he was thinking. She raised an eyebrow, and he relented. "I don't know if I could stand driving you away."

She gave him a mournful look, an expression that said she wished she could tell him yes, but she couldn't. And he didn't expect her to, ever, let alone now. He would take what he could get, loving her from the sidelines and doing his best to keep her happy. And if the day came where she said yes to him, he would rejoice. He thought back to Alice's happy, enthusiastic texts once more. It was clear she had seen some sort of happy ending for them, and he finally allowed himself to be encouraged by the idea. Maybe, just maybe, they had a shot at happiness after all.

Bella must have seen the uplift in his expression, because she smiled at him once more. "That's it," she said. "I hate seeing you so sad like that."

He took her chin gently in his hand. "Well, that goes for both of us my dear," he returned.

She blushed in response, and he laughed, amazed at how beautiful she was and how he had never noticed before. He stroked his thumb gently along her cheek and heard her heart stutter slightly in response. "I believe it's time to go," he said softly. "I'm not sure being here is in your best interest just yet."

Her easy smile faded slightly, reminding him that she was still in pain, and felt bad for putting her in such a position when she still had so much to heal from. She must have caught it in his expression, because she gave him a glare. "Don't you dare Carlisle," she said seriously. "Don't go beating yourself up about things that are out of your control."

She stared him down until he nodded in defeat, grudgingly admitting to himself that she was right. She smiled at him then, before rising up to her tip toes and kissing him softly on the cheek. He relished the moment, closing his eyes at the wonderful feel of her lips on his skin, though he knew it was simply a friendly gesture.

"Thank you," she said softly.


	8. Chapter 8

The weekend passed slowly, and Bella was grateful for the extra days it gave her to recuperate. Every night, Carlisle held her as she slept, effectively keeping the nightmares at bay and allowing her the rest she needed. With him there with her so much, the depression and nothingness were held at bay as well, and for the first time in four months she felt normal. During the days, Carlisle cooked all of her meals, making sure that she got the calories she needed without shocking her digestive system after so long with so little to eat.

On Sunday Carlisle spent the day hunting, after Bella had all but kicked him out the door. His eyes were nearly black, meaning he was in a state of thirst he usually never let himself get to. She had noticed in the past that his eyes never got darker than her own before he went hunting, and the iris and pupil were nearly impossible to distinguish from one another.

Once Carlisle left, Bella was faced with an entire Sunday with nothing to do. The clarity of her thoughts was unusual, and she realized that it had been months since she had seen Jacob. The thought was barely through her mind before she was grabbing her keys, and without another thought Bella scrawled a note saying where she had gone, and stepped out into the drizzle.

Bella had barely pulled up to the house before Jacob bolted out the door, staring at the truck in shock. He recovered quickly, wrenching the door open and pulling her into a suffocating hug.

"Good… to see… you too… Jake," Bella choked out.

"Oops, sorry Bella," he laughed at her, grinning widely. "I can't believe you're here, it's been so long!"

Bella nodded, somewhat sadly. "I know, Jake. I know."

"My dad said Charlie said you haven't really been here since… the last few months." She could tell he changed his sentence mid-thought, and she was grateful for it. "What changed?"

"Your dad didn't tell you?" She asked sharply.

Jacob gave her a look of confusion. "No, he didn't. What?"

Bella sighed resignedly. "Carlisle came back to check on me," she told him. "He saw how bad I was and decided to stick around."

Jacob nodded thoughtfully, not saying anything. Bella knew he didn't believe the legends that his father did, and she was grateful for that. She like that her friendship with him was relatively uncomplicated, minus the fact that he had a crush on her anyway.

"Can we not…" she trailed off awkwardly, feeling like a chicken for avoiding the subject. Fortunately, he understood.

"Sure," he said brightly. "Feel like a walk?"

She smiled at him and nodded, grateful for his easy understanding. She'd forgotten what it was like with Jacob, how effortless it was. The day passed slowly and lazily, with a walk along the beach and then easy chatter as Jacob worked on some new project in his garage, she had no idea what he was really doing. Before she knew it, the sun was sinking toward the horizon.

"Hey Jake, I didn't realize how late it was getting, I gotta go," she said quickly. Jacob looked up at the sky and nodded.

"Yeah you should probably get going. Here, I'll walk you to your truck," he said lightly, standing and wiping his hands off on a rag sitting on the ground. Jacob took her hand gently in his, and Bella decided to just leave it there. It wasn't worth causing a fight over. He saw her off with a cheerful "come back soon!" and she started up the truck and drove out of La Push.

About three miles out of LaPush, a mysterious grinding sound came from the engine. Immediately she began to slow down, but with a sputter and a loud crash, the truck died completely. The truck drifted to a stop, and Bella was surprised to discover that she had to throw all her weight against the wheel to get it to turn, guiding herself to the side of the road. She tried, probably stupidly, to restart the truck, but received no response.

"Damnit!" She swore, realizing she didn't have any way to contact someone to have them pick her up. Shaking her head angrily, Bella dug around for a pen and paper. When she finally found what she was looking for, she scrawled the words 'don't bother, it's dead' on the back of a receipt and stuck it on the dash. Snatching her wallet, Bella hopped out of the truck and began to walk back to La Push.

Bella was grateful when she finally reached the Black's house once more, it had been a long time since she had walked that far. Hearing sounds from Jacob's garage, she wearily walked in that direction. Jacob didn't notice her until she called his name.

"Jacob!" she all but shouted at him. With a start, he looked up in surprise.

"Bella, hey, I didn't hear you pull up."

She grimaced. "That's because I didn't," she said wearily, plopping down on the ground. He gave her a confused look, and she explained. "I don't know what happened but it didn't sound good. It died a few miles down the road, I walked back."

Jacob jumped up immediately. "Crap Bells, I'm sorry. Come on, lets go have a look."

Bella groaned. "Can I just stay here? I don't usually walk that far," she said. She was surprised to find she was as out of shape as she was.

Jacob chuckled and walked over to her, bending down and scooping her up in one smooth motion.

"Jacob!" She yelped in shock. "Put me down!"

He ignored her, however, and carried her over to their car before setting her down. Bella grumbled to herself as she got in the passenger seat.

Jacob drove faster than she did, and they were back to the truck in just a couple of minutes.

"Just stay here, I'll have a look," Jacob told her before jogging over to the truck and popping the hood. She watched idly as he poked around under the hood for approximately thirty seconds, before making a face and slamming the hood back down.

"What's the verdict?" She asked when he got back in the car.

"Scrap metal," Jacob said. "It's a goner, the whole engine would have to be replaced and it's just not worth it."

"Damn," she muttered.

He chuckled lightly. "Sorry Bella. That thing was pushing it anyway, I'm surprised it lasted this long."

They drove back to Forks in silence, Bella mourning the loss of her truck. Not only was she quite fond of the truck, losing it also meant losing her independence. Finding another vehicle for the small amount of money in her savings account would be nearly impossible. She felt a lift in her spirits, however, when she saw the sleek black Mercedes sitting in the driveway next to Charlie's cruiser.

"Thanks for the ride Jake," she said. "Sorry about the truck."

"No problem Bella. Next time you want to come visit just call me," he said lightly. "And get a cell phone," he advised as an afterthought. She laughed and agreed with him, and Jacob drove off.

Tiredly, she walked into the house and made her way to the living room where she heard Charlie and Carlisle talking. Charlie looked up at her in surprise, then out the window, clearly wondering why he hadn't heard the roar of the truck when she came home. She flopped down, exhausted, next to Carlisle as Charlie spoke.

"Truck?" He asked curiously.

"It died," she said simply. "A couple miles out of La Push. Jacob says it's toast."

Charlie's brow furrowed. "How'd you make it back then? You didn't walk all that way did you Bells?"

"No, I just walked back to La Push. Jacob drove back to the truck, delivered the diagnosis and brought me home."

"Hence the cell phone comment?" Carlisle asked easily.

She chuckled, having briefly forgotten how keen his senses were. "Yeah," she said lightly.

…

Charlie had already gone to bed when Bella decided to go up to her room. She had been avoiding it, her legs were killing her. Eventually, though, she couldn't put it off any longer. With a groan, she stood and trudged over to the stairs, hissing slightly in pain as she started to climb. Before she knew what was happening, she was being held - again.

"Carlisle," she complained weakly, not truly upset. Her legs really were killing her. He smiled at her in amusement, but didn't respond as he ascended the stairs at a human pace. That was one of the things she had always liked about Carlisle. He wasn't always in a hurry, doing everything at top speed. He was completely content to go at a slower pace.

Carlisle deftly deposited her at the bathroom door, flitting away momentarily and returning with her pajamas before she had noticed he was gone.

Okay, most times he was content to go at a human pace, she amended silently.

"Take a bath," he advised softly, "It will help." She nodded as he smiled at her, before closing the door behind her and following his advice.

The bath had done quite a bit of good, but her muscles were still sore and tight as she walked gingerly into her bedroom, a fact his sharp eyes did not miss.

"Still sore?"

"Yeah," she said softly. "I can't remember the last time I walked that far."

"Lay down," he instructed quietly, sitting down on the bed.

She did so, and he pulled her legs onto his lap before grasping her left foot in his cool hands. Gingerly he began to prod and knead the muscles in her foot, the temperature of his skin doing as much good as what he was actually doing. He slowly worked his way up, to her calf, stroking his hands lightly along the skin before beginning to knead the muscles, letting his hands work their way slowly up her leg.

When he reached her thigh, however, his soft strokes along her skin began to ignite a low, steady burn of arousal in her lower abdomen. She knew he could hear the way her heart stuttered and sped up, and a blush stained her cheeks. Either he was unusually oblivious or ignoring it entirely, because he didn't appear to react at all. She bit back a sigh of mixed relief and disappointment when his hands abandoned her left thigh, and he started the treatment over on her right leg.

Now that she was aroused, however, every brush and stroke of his fingers against her skin as he worked his way up her leg only served to arouse her further, despite the fact he was still working his way up her calf.

As his fingers brushed the back of her thigh, however, she felt a trickle of lubrication flow from her body. Her eyes flitted to Carlisle's face, but he didn't show any reaction. Relief had barely flooded her system when he inhaled again, and froze completely.

Her cheeks burned red with shame as she realized she was caught. And what was worse, his hands had stopped their delicious torture, resting completely still on her leg. After several long seconds, Carlisle released the breath, and resumed his movements as though nothing had happened. She did not miss, however, that he did not breathe again.

He finished his careful massage a couple minutes later, leaving her legs feeling significantly better than they had before and her lower regions slick and swollen, throbbing with desire. The way his hands had moved over her was nothing short of erotic, and the moment he shifted backward to lie next to her she clenched her thighs closed, desperately wishing the feeling would just go away.

"I'm sorry," he said softly, not meeting her eyes and looking rather embarrassed. Bella blushed furiously and didn't answer, nearly crying out of humiliation and frustration. There had been one time she had snuck one of her mother's romance novels out of her room and read it in the dead of night. She had always scoffed at the idea that a woman could be left begging before the man even kissed her, but it was clear she was wrong.

"It's not…" she began uncertainly, before trailing off. She really couldn't say it wasn't his fault, she realized. Frankly, it was. She shifted her weight once more hoping to be discreet about it. As she expected, however, his eyes picked up on the movement without effort, and she could see the guilt in his expression. She blushed deeper when his light gold gaze met hers, and as he pulled in the first breath in five minutes to answer her, she watched his eyes darken a fraction with his own desire. Another thrill of lust shot through her body, and a tiny whimper escaped her lips, though she did her best to stop it.

She could see the uncertainty in his eyes, and silently she begged him to just fix it already. She wouldn't say the words aloud, but the need was becoming unbearable.

…

Carlisle deliberated heavily as he watched Bella squirm in discomfort, tortured by the waves of desire he had unintentionally triggered. On one hand, she had made it quite clear that she wasn't ready for any sort of relationship with anyone, not with Edward's leaving still so prominent in her mind and heart. On the other hand, she was clearly on the edge of madness, and he could see the pleading in her eyes. He pulled in another breath, the heady scent of her arousal shooting straight to his erect penis and making him even harder.

He shifted his weight until he hovered partially over her, left hand resting on her abdomen and bracing himself with his right arm. "Do you want me to help you?" he whispered softly, voice unintentionally husky and thick with his own desire. Her blood was pounding through her veins, and he could smell the flood of hormones it was carrying.

She bit her lip, clearly unsure how to answer his question. "I can see it in your eyes, Bella, but my conscience needs to hear it," he told her honestly.

"Do you… want to?" she asked him softly, another blush staining her cheeks heavily.

"Do not be ashamed of your body's natural responses, Bella," he told her softly. "And yes," he continued, shifting his legs so that his erection pressed against her thigh. "You have no idea," he whispered.

She visibly shuddered, before nodding her head. "Please," she whispered, looking humiliated.

He took her chin in his hand and coaxed her into looking at him. "Do not," he repeated, "be ashamed. You are beautiful, and your smell affects me in ways I cannot describe." After several moments, she nodded, seeming to relax slightly.

Without a moment's hesitation, Carlisle's hand slid down into her pants, fingers gliding quickly across the slick flesh. Two fingers slid into her immediately, making her grunt and causing her hips to buck up into his hand. Carlisle nearly stifled his groan at the feeling, but decided not to when he realized he had chastised Bella for doing much the same thing. Her eyes flitted to him when the sound was released from his throat, and he slowly began to flex his wrist, letting his fingers slide in and out of her as his thumb brushed repeatedly across her clit.

Her pupils dilated as she let out a moan, and Carlisle dropped his head down beside hers.

"Shhh, you don't want to wake him," he whispered quietly into her ear. She nodded and bit her lip, trying to quiet the moans that were escaping her as she ground her hips against his palm, desperate for more friction. She whimpered once more, and Carlisle realized that he was torturing her unnecessarily when she simply needed relief.

Instantly he sped up his tempo, wrist pumping quickly as his thumb rubbed quick circles around her clit, making her arch off the bed and keen loudly. The sound went straight to his own groin, and he growled in frustration as he pushed her further. More sounds came from deep in her throat, and loathe as he was to push himself on her, Carlisle covered her mouth with his own to quiet the noise. She was writhing now, hips almost permanently off the bed and letting out a constant string of keening moans. Clearly beyond herself, Bella reached down and attempted to press his hand more firmly against her. He upped his pace again, hearing the slide of his fingers against her hot, slick flesh as her body reached it's limit and clenched around his fingers. Her thighs clenched as her hips instinctively bucked, and she cried out sharply and repeatedly as she shook and spasmed, thankfully muffled by his mouth covering hers.

Carlisle panted as he withdrew his hand from her pants, kissing her temple lightly and wiping his fingers off on the side of his sweat pants. His erection was becoming increasingly bothersome, and he couldn't help the growl of frustration deep in his chest. Her expression clouded with confusion for a moment before she became aware of his erection still pressing against her thigh, and she blushed slightly.

She gave him a very uncomfortable look before opening her mouth and speaking hesitantly. "If you need to… um… I mean, if you want…" Her sentence trailed off and she gestured, embarrassed, toward his groin.

He gave her a serious, yet slightly desperate look. "Are you sure?" He asked seriously. She nodded, and he didn't argue further, too desperate for his own relief. Carlisle flipped onto his back and thrust the hem of his pants down, pulling his erection free. He knew her eyes followed his movements carefully, but he didn't have the patience to take things slowly. Quickly, he spit into his palm and wrapped his hand tightly around himself as he began to pump furiously. He knew that his arm would be a blur to her, but the seconds that it took for him to reach his peak seemed like hours.

His orgasm was the most intense he had experienced in the last thirty years, and he couldn't restrain another growl as it ripped out of his throat, contents of his sac spewing over his bare chest as he tore his shirt off.

Carlisle breathed deeply, tugging his pants back into place and wiping his chest with his shirt as he came down from his own high. When he opened his eyes, Carlisle turned his head and met the wide brown eyes still staring at him. "I'm sorry," he said softly, "I couldn't take it."

"I know the feeling," she said with a rueful chuckle. Her expression became troubled, and he rolled over carefully.

"What's wrong?" He asked her softly.

She heaved a sigh and looked at him sadly. "I don't want to… lead you on," she confessed. "I feel like doing… that might have given you the wrong impression." Guilt was written all over her face, and Carlisle ignored the pang in his chest as he kissed her forehead.

"I know Bella," he assured. "I unintentionally started something, and it was only fair of me to finish it. I know that's all there is." She nodded at him, and he squeezed her shoulder gently before crossing the room to open the window. When he returned to the bed, she gave him a confused look. "Airing out the room," he explained. "I'm not the only one who would be able to smell this."

Bella blushed furiously again as she inhaled through her nose, realizing for the first time that the room smelled unmistakably of sex, something she could recognize even though it was something she had never smelled before. He chuckled lightly at her expression.

"Don't worry. By the time he wakes up it will have aired out. Go to sleep, Bella," he sighed. She closed her eyes and snuggled into his chest, and was asleep within moments. When Carlisle was assured she was sound asleep, he inhaled deeply, making sure he cemented every facet of the smell into his mind to cherish.


	9. Chapter 9

Carlisle watched Bella anxiously as she began to wake, wondering how she would feel about the previous night in the light of day. Her eyelids fluttered before opening completely, and he lay completely still as sleep-fogged confusion slowly turned into awareness.

...

Bella's cheeks flushed richly as the previous night came back to her. She wasn't quite sure how to feel about it, but she knew that Carlisle respected her enough that he wouldn't push for anything she wasn't ready to give. Last night had been an anomaly, unexpected. And as she deliberated, she caught sight of Carlisle's facial expression and felt a flash of guilt go through her. While she was sitting there deciding how to react, he was thinking that she was angry with him.

Bella took a deep breath and decided to put the whole thing on the back burner for now. Carlisle had only done as she had practically begged him to do, and she couldn't honestly say she regretted it. She smiled at him reassuringly then, needing to let him know his worries were unfounded.

"Good morning," she said.

Carlisle visibly relaxed, and gave her a smile of his own in return. "Good morning to you as well."

Bella stretched out, feeling the tightness in her legs and groaning slightly. It wasn't nearly as bad as it could be, however she was still sore.

"Should wear off once you get up and moving," Carlisle told her. She nodded, the problem was motivating herself to get going.

"I'll make your breakfast while you get ready. Then I'll drive you to school before I run some errands, and pick you up at the end of the day. How does that sound?"

Bella nodded and sat up. "That works. I'm sorry you need to drive me around." She sighed, the loss of her own vehicle was really going to be a damper. She would have to start saving immediately. She sighed heavily.

"What is it?"

"Gonna miss my truck," she told him with a grin. "I liked that truck."

He grinned at her and stood, kissing her hair before holding the door open. She snagged her bathroom bag on the way out, and headed for the shower as Carlisle headed for the kitchen.

When she came down to the kitchen, she had barely sat down when a huge omelette was put in front of her, and she stared at Carlisle in shock. "I'll never be able to eat all this!"

"Try," he said with a smile, "you might surprise yourself."

Bella rolled her eyes at him and began to eat as he cleaned up the kitchen, surprising herself greatly when she finished it. She frowned slightly at the plate.

"Your body has gotten used to eating regularly again, and now that you are its top priority is going to be putting the weight that you lost back on."

Bella nodded, it made sense to her.

"Now come on, I'll get you to school." Bella groaned, and Carlisle looked at her curiously.

"Jess has been on me for a month and a half about finding someone new. I'm sure she's gonna notice I'm livelier than usual and pester me for details about some mystery boyfriend that doesn't exist," she said wearily.

Carlisle looked at her thoughtfully, and she could have sworn the look in his eyes was nearly... mischievous.

She narrowed her eyes at him, and he laughed aloud.

"What are you thinking?" She asked warily.

"I'm thinking of ways to mess with her head," he said honestly. She gave him a confused look. "Would you mind if I... led her to believe some things?" He asked with a grin.

Bella couldn't help herself, she laughed aloud. "Go for it," she said with a chuckle. "Just make sure I get to see her face."

"You've got a deal," he replied, "now lets get going."

...

Carlisle dropped Bella off at school, dropped his Mercedes off at home, changed into some more expensive dress clothes Alice had bought him, and ran to Seattle, headed for the main car dealership in the center of town. It was a busy place, but he had dressed in a way that assured he would be taken seriously and made a priority. Sure enough, he had barely been in the door thirty seconds before one of the top salesmen approached him.

"Hello sir, my name is Jordan, how may I help you today?" The man asked after eyeing him up and down carefully. Carlisle was relieved. Dress like a wealthy man, get treated like a wealthy man. It was helpful when you were in a hurry.

"I'm looking for a vehicle for my cousin," he invented on the spot, not wanting inquiries about a non existent girlfriend or fianceé. "Her pickup died last night and she's in desperate need of a new one as soon as possible. I wanted to do her the favor," he said with a smile.

"Of course sir. What are you thinking?"

"Probably another truck, she was quite fond of hers," he began. Carlisle thought for a moment, unsure what else he was looking for.

"Are you thinking something new and bright, maybe something on the flashy side..." He asked, clearly wanting to sell one of his best. Carlisle furrowed his brow and shook his head after a moment.

"No, I'm not thinking so. She doesn't like attention, so she wouldn't want anything that would catch eyes..."

"So maybe something used, a couple years old maybe?" The man asked thoughtfully.

"Yes," Carlisle told him, "Something fairly new and in good shape obviously, but something fairly plain as well. Nothing too expensive, she'd be upset if I spent more than I needed to." Carlisle thought for a second and chuckled ruefully. "Well, she'll be upset regardless, she's not one for gifts. Unfortunately for her though, a vehicle is kind of a necessity."

Jordan smiled. "You know, I think I may have just what you're looking for, if you care to follow me?" Carlisle nodded, waiting for Jordan as he grabbed a set of keys and followed the man out the door and into the lot, to a plain, medium sized black pickup. "Three years old, forty-seven thousand miles. Twenty-four thousand, five hundred if paid up front. Still in great shape, comes with a limited warranty. Not too big or too small, not flashy. Decent amount of power but nothing too heavy duty. What do you think?"

Carlisle looked it over critically, walking around it and checking it over carefully. He judged the height, making sure it wasn't too tall for her to easily get in and out of. "May I?" He asked, placing a hand on the driver side door.

"Absolutely, Mister..."

"Cullen," Carlisle supplied, stepping into the cab and closing the door behind him. Jordan got in the passenger seat and handed Carlisle the key. Carlisle started it and was pleased to find that it was like listening to the putter of a single engine plane after standing next to a commercial jet. On it's own, it was far from quiet, but didn't have the deafening volume her old truck had had.

Carlisle took it around town a bit, getting a feel for it and comparing it in his head to her old truck, which he had only driven once. All in all they were similar, other than the brakes and gas being more responsive, and the significantly quieter volume. Carlisle pulled back into the dealership and parked in front of the building.

"I'll take it," he said as he shut the engine off and climbed out.

"Excellent," Jordan said, seeming genuinely pleased at the easy sale. "Will you be setting up a payment plan or..." he trailed off, sounding as though he didn't expect Carlisle to say yes.

"No need," Carlisle said with a smile, meeting Jordan's expectations. The man nodded as though he had been expecting this.

A half hour later, Carlisle slipped the keys into the ignition and drove out of the lot, wondering how mad Bella was going to be.

...

When the final bell rang, Bella nervously walked out of the building with Jessica and Angela, wondering what Carlisle was going to do. Fortunately, Jessica spotted Carlisle before she did.

"Bella, your ride is here," Jessica said coyly. Bella looked in the direction Jessica was, and stifled a giggle. Carlisle waited for her at the curb, leaning casually against the side of his car as he waited for her. Upon spotting her, or acting like it, he pushed off and walked directly up to her.

When he got closer, she realized he was more casually dressed than she had ever seen before, wearing a pair of dark jeans and a long sleeve button down shirt with the top three buttons undone, showing off a good portion of his throat and upper chest. She fought to keep her expression straight and not laugh aloud at the smug expression on his face. Clearly, he knew he looked hot as hell. He had styled his hair differently too, adopting a more casual look that made him look much younger than the thirty-four he claimed. With a start, she realized he looked his age. He looked twenty-three.

Bella could feel the stares boring into her, not just from Jessica, but everyone around as Carlisle walked casually up to her, grabbing her bag with his right hand and slipping it onto his own shoulder. Angela was far more discreet with her shock, but Bella could still see it in her eyes and posture. She preferred it to Jessica's blatantly shocked stare though.

"Miss Stanley, Miss Webber," Carlisle said casually, "I don't believe we've met before." Carlisle held out his left hand to shake theirs instead of his right, and with a mental start she realized why. He had removed his wedding band, something both of her friends noticed immediately.

"D-doctor Cullen," Jessica stammered, holding onto his hand just a fraction too long, which Carlisle ignored. "It's nice to meet you."

Angela held herself together far better, despite the fact that Carlisle had turned the full force of his smile upon them both. "So pleased to meet you Mister Cullen," Angela said politely.

"Thank you," he said with another winning smile. "Bella talks about both of you quite often, I'm happy to have finally met her friends."

Bella barely stifled a giggle at Jessica's incredulous expression. "Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow," she said quickly. With a final nod, Carlisle turned with her, placing his hand on the small of her back as they walked away.

Once they were both safely in the car and speeding away, Bella could no longer contain her mirth, and laughed loudly. "Carlisle you're a genius," she chuckled. "That was brilliant."

He laughed along with her. "It certainly was amusing," he agreed, "though I fear I've caused you more trouble."

Bella shook her head. "Totally worth it," she said happily. "That look suits you, by the way," she told him, blushing.

"Thank you," he returned simply, not commenting on or acknowledging her embarrassment. "Oh, I got you something today..." he trailed off, looking sheepish. "I know you're going to be mad, but I swear I mean well."

She looked at him sharply, wondering what on earth he had done. "What is it?"

He ducked his head slightly, and leaned over to open the glove box. "This isn't it, but I'll give you this first. Jacob had a point last night, so I had you added to our plan. It costs next to nothing, and you have unlimited talk and text," he told her, handing her a small, silver flip phone.

"Thank you Carlisle," she said genuinely. "Now what else did you do?" He shot her a guilty look, slowing to turn onto her street.

"Close your eyes," he pleaded.

She rolled her eyes before complying, wondering what he could have gotten her that would make him act this way. His attitude alone spoke volumes of the differences between him and Edward. Edward would have proudly boasted about whatever he had done, not feeling the least bit guilty or acknowledging her dislike of gifts. Carlisle's behavior spoke volumes, showing that he not only paid attention but also cared. It also suggested that whatever he had done, he thought was a necessity. She took a deep breath, trying to convince herself to stay calm.

Bella was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't realize she was home until Carlisle opened her door. "Keep them closed a minute," he instructed, helping her out of the car and guiding her across the driveway. Gently, he took her hand in his and opened it, placing something carefully in her palm. "Now open," he said, and she could hear the nervousness in his voice.

She did as he asked and looked at the object in her hand. It was a set of keys. Slowly, she looked up, jaw dropping as she took in the sight of the black truck sitting where her old one once had. Bella opened her mouth to go on a tirade before she really looked at it.

It was medium sized and a simple, nondescript black color. While nice and obviously on the newer side, the paint didn't possess the sleek, glossy shine of a brand new vehicle, nor did the style of the body fit in with the newest models constantly advertised on T.V. Instead of getting her something huge and flashy and brand new the way Edward would have done in an attempt to show off how rich he was, Carlisle had gotten something simple and plain, something that would run well but wouldn't stand out by any stretch of the imagination.

"How many miles?" She asked.

"Forty-seven thousand," he answered promptly. "About three years old, and very average. Not a ton of power, I know you don't need anything like that. And Bella," he said, changing to a serious tone. She turned to look at him, and he continued. "I know you hate gifts and having people spend money on you, but you need a vehicle and you can't afford anything particularly reliable. I know you hate being the center of attention and I know you don't want or need anything particularly flashy or brand new. So please try not to be too upset with me," he implored.

She was touched that he had thought of her, and not just thought about showing off his wealth. Sure it was way too much, but with the kind of money he had, she realized it wasn't a big deal. She smiled at him gratefully, jogging over to him and throwing her arms around his neck. "I love it Carlisle, truly. Thank you," she said happily, leaning into him.

"Wait, really?" He asked incredulously.

She leaned back to look him in the eye. "Well of course it's too much, but you thought about what I would actually want instead of using it as an excuse to show off," she explained. "You got what you knew I would want instead of the most expensive thing you could find." She thought for a moment as it really dawned on her. "You thought of me," she explained with a smile.

Carlisle smiled at her, seeming incredibly relieved. "You're very welcome, Bella."


	10. Chapter 10

"So what's with the truck?" Charlie asked Carlisle casually.

Carlisle was sitting in the living room with Charlie while Bella did her homework upstairs in her room. Carlisle had known the question was coming, but it still made him slightly anxious. Charlie was going for nonchalant, but his heartbeat was a dead giveaway. Carlisle prayed that Bella's father was not as observant as she.

"A vehicle is kind of a necessity for her. I knew something expensive and flashy would upset her so I went with something plain," Carlisle said with a shrug. "I went one better actually," he continued with a grin. "I even got something used. It was painful, but I knew she would prefer it."

Charlie shifted his weight uncomfortably. "I appreciate the gesture Carlisle but I'm not sure... It goes against my nature to accept such an expensive gift from someone."

Carlisle nodded, he expected something like this. "It's a trait Bella picked up from you," he said fondly. Charlie blushed, and he chuckled.

"I mean I know you're... well off, Carlisle but-"

Carlisle couldn't help the laugh, even though it was rude. "Buying that truck for Bella was equivalent to you buying Billy a pack of gum. It's truly no trouble at all, I won't even notice."

Charlie still looked uncomfortable, but it seemed as though he was going to let it slide. "Well if you're sure..."

Carlisle smiled serenely. "I am. It was Edward's plan to replace the truck when it eventually quit anyway." Carlisle paused to chuckle. "You should be glad it was me."

Charlie gave Carlisle a wary look.

"Trust me, you don't want to know. Let's just say that he would have spent a minimum of five times what I did, without flinching."

Charlie chuckled. "She would have hated him."

Carlisle laughed as well, agreeing. Carlisle was struck by a sudden idea, and laughed internally as he thought.

"You ever get tired of driving that cruiser everywhere Charlie?" He asked, perfectly casual, ten minutes later.

Charlie grunted. "You have no idea," he muttered, more to himself than anything.

"So it would be nice to have something else?"

"I sure as hell wouldn-" Charlie cut himself off sharply to glare at Carlisle, who allowed a Cheshire cat grin to spread across his face. "Don't even think about it," Charlie warned. Carlisle laughed loudly in response, earning another glare.

"Don't give me that look Charlie, I could dig enough money to buy an F-350 out of my couch." Normally Carlisle wouldn't boast of his wealth this way, but he knew Charlie was uncomfortable with people spending money on him, just as Bella was. Furthermore, he saw the look of longing in Charlie's eyes when he had mentioned it.

"In all seriousness, I would be delighted to go to the dealership with you tomorrow. I had forgotten how good it feels to gift people with things they can't afford on their own," Carlisle said sincerely.

Carlisle had evidently underestimated just how badly Charlie wanted something he could take out fishing with him, because the man was actually considering his offer. He hadn't expected even that much, and the reality made him extremely happy. "I won't go as far as Edward and do such a thing behind your back. But if you decide you want to, don't hesitate to say so. It's been a very long time since I've been able to do such a thing for someone who didn't have access to the same funds," he said with a wry smile.

"I'll make you a deal," Charlie grumbled. "We go to your place right now. Whatever you actually have stashed in the couch," he said with a grin, "you can use to get me something. Fair?" Clearly, Charlie was thinking that Carlisle was kidding when he made the crack about having enough in the couch. Little did Charlie know, he was completely serious. Carlisle knew damn well there was fifty thousand dollars in each cushion of the longest couch in the living room.

Carlisle grinned and stood, "Lets go." Charlie wavered, clearly not expecting the wide grin that crossed Carlisle's face. "Bella!" Carlisle called.

Bella's quiet mutter came from her bedroom. "Hang on a sec." A few seconds later, he heard a pen drop to the desk and she jogged down the stairs. "What's up?"

Carlisle grinned widely again. "Your father and I were discussing vehicles, and whether or not I was allowed to buy him something more equipped for his fishing trips," Carlisle began. Bella began to grin, sensing where this was going already. "Just like you would, he objected. I said that I had enough money in the couch to buy a... truck that would dwarf your own, anyway." Carlisle had edited his sentence deliberately, he knew she would have no idea what an F-350 was.

"Okay," Bella said carefully, clearly holding back laughter.

Charlie cut in this time, "I told him that whatever he actually can dig out of the couch, he could spend on me."

Bella laughed aloud. "Bad idea dad," she said with a giggle.

Charlie groaned. "Well lets get this overwith then," he muttered, heading toward the door. Bella turned and grinned at Carlisle, who chuckled.

"I'm surprised you're not on his side, considering how you are about gifts," Carlisle told her.

"Hey, if I have to suffer through it so does he," she said with a giggle. Carlisle grinned in response.

...

"Okay, lets get this overwith," Charlie grumbled once more, walking into the living room. Carlisle pointed at the three-cushioned couch across from the T.V.

"Inside the cushions, you'll have to unzip them," he said.

Charlie tugged the first cushion off and unzipped it, pulling the cover off roughly. Clearly he had a feeling he shouldn't have bluffed, but it was too late now. Just then, his cell phone pinged.

 _"Relax, he's going to love it once it's done."_  Alice, of course.

Charlie had found the square cut in the underside of the cushion and pulled it open, to reveal five stacks of ten thousand dollars. Carlisle heard the whoosh as his breath exited his lungs, and he was next to the older man immediately.

"Are you okay?" Carlisle asked, concerned. Charlie shook his head dazedly.

"How much more is there?" He asked warily.

"The same in the other two," Carlisle responded.

"Jesus," Charlie said softly. After heaving a sigh, he gave in. "Well a deal's a deal I guess. We can go tomorrow."

"Once it's yours, you'll be in love," Carlisle said confidently.

"Alice?" Bella asked with a grin.

Carlisle nodded. "Alice," he agreed.


	11. Chapter 11

"This is entirely unnecessary," Charlie grumbled the next day as Carlisle pulled into the same dealership he had gotten Bella's truck from the day before.

Carlisle chuckled in response. "That's a matter of opinion," he responded. "And no matter what the opinion is, fact remains I enjoy giving people things very much. It makes me happy." Charlie looked at him as though he was crazy, but didn't argue.

Jordan looked positively delighted when he spotted Carlisle once again.

"Mr. Cullen! So good to have you back, what brings you in today?"

"My friend here is looking for something to take when he goes out fishing for the weekend, on the back roads and the like. I was hoping you could help him out," Carlisle said, laughing internally. There was no way Charlie was leaving without something now.

"Excellent, Mr. Cullen." He turned to Charlie and extended his hand. "Hello sir, my name is Jordan."

Charlie took his hand, looking as though he was torn between his manners and walking out the door right then and there.

"Charlie Swan," he responded reluctantly.

"So what are you looking for exactly? Something standard or more heavy duty?"

Charlie thought for a moment. "Probably on the heavy duty side I suppose. Where I usually go I end up doing quite a bit of walking, can't hardly take the cruiser through that mess. And there are some places I'd really like to try out but it would require something that could do some serious off roading."

"Are you thinking new or used?" Jordan asked, shooting a glance at Carlisle, though he spoke to Charlie.

"I'd rather something used honestly. I'd feel bad if I messed up something brand new and pretty."

Carlisle chuckled, he had to admit the Chief had a point.

"If you'll follow me sir, I can show you our selection of used trucks," he said to Charlie. Jordan glanced to Carlisle then, "And what about you, Mr. Cullen? Were you wanting to join us?"

Carlisle shook his head politely, he didn't want Charlie to feel overwhelmed. "I think I'm going to have a look around over here," he said, gesturing out the window to the sleek, fast cars on prominent display. Jordan nodded enthusiastically and turned to the door, holding it open to a still-reluctant Charlie.

Carlisle followed them out and veered off toward the most expensive part of the lot. He loved his Mercedes, but he also wanted something smaller and sportier. He wouldn't be able to get one today, since he had to drive his own car home, but it was an idea.

Bella was changing him, he thought. That was for sure. He felt younger when he was with her, more... himself. Shaking his head, he made his way toward the building once more. Even if it was a high end dealership, they just didn't stock what he was looking for.

A half hour later, Charlie walked back in with Jordan, grinning ear to ear. Clearly, he'd found something he loved. Carlisle joined them happily.

"I wasn't gonna do something brand new, but he talked me in to it," Charlie said, trying to sound annoyed and failing miserably. "F-350," he said happily. "Billy and Harry will shit themselves." Carlisle laughed aloud, he could only imagine the reaction it would cause. In the back of his mind, he also knew they may think it was a bribe, but he would keep that tidbit to himself for the time being, he didn't want to spoil the man's fun.

"How much?" Carlisle asked, pulling out his checkbook.

"Fifty-eight two,"Jordan informed him casually. Carlisle nodded and filled out the check.

Charlie shook his hand enthusiastically. "I owe you for the rest of my life Carlisle. Seriously. I didn't think I'd be able to accept it, but I'm breaking my rules today." Carlisle grinned, glad he was able to make Charlie happy today.

"Glad to help Charlie. See you later?"

Charlie nodded, "I'm sure."

...

When he got back to the Swan house, Carlisle could hear Bella up in her room, doing homework of some kind. Wondering in the back of his mind when he had started acting so much younger, Carlisle darted around to the back of the house and leapt lightly to the window, not making a sound as he slid through and leaned against the wall.

It was five minutes before she noticed him, jumping six inches in the air in the process. He failed to stifle his laugh, before walking over to her and beginning to rub her shoulders. She gave up her glare as her head dropped forward onto the desk with a deep moan, making something in his lower abdomen curl slightly. God he needed to get a handle on himself, he had never reacted this way to a woman before.

He continued kneading her shoulders, feeling the tension in them slowly ease and trying to beat down his mental fantasies all the while. It was everything he could do to not lean over, kiss his way down her pale throat... He clamped down on the thought viciously and tried desperately to not think of the fact that Charlie wouldn't be home for at least three hours. He growled low in his chest, and unsurprisingly she heard him. She turned to ask him what was wrong, but something in his expression must have given him away, because she blushed and didn't say anything. Immediately he felt shame burn through him.

"I'm very sorry Bella. I don't know what's wrong with me, I'm usually much better at controlling my..." he trailed off, not knowing what words to use. He could see that she was trying very hard to pretend she was unaffected, but unfortunately for her he could hear the increase in her heart rate and smell the hormones flooding her blood stream. She stood from her chair and walked forward as though pulled to him by some invisible force, stopping right in front of him.

His hands found her waist automatically, and he fought to keep himself still, to stop himself from kissing her, exploring every inch of her warm, soft- Again, he cut the thought off sharply, needing to keep himself in control. Instead of lowering his face to hers, he pulled her against his chest, holding her tight and winding his hand through her hair. He couldn't even begin to deny it any longer, he was desperately in love with the young woman in his arms. His embrace tightened, and he felt her squeeze him back. He pressed his lips against her hair gently, cherishing the moment.

He felt her breathing hitch slightly, and pulled her back to look in her eyes. As he had suspected, they were full of tears.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked worriedly. He didn't think he'd used too much pressure, he was practiced enough that it was second nature.

She shook her head quickly, and he sighed in relief. "No, nothing like that, it's just..." She wiped her cheeks, and he caught a couple stray tears with the pad of his thumb.

"Just what?" He asked softly.

"I wish I could give you what you want," she whispered. "And I probably could, but I don't want to take the risk of ending up using you as a rebound. I couldn't look at myself again if I hurt you that way."

And of course he would never tell her how much every word out of her mouth hurt, but he understood. Then his mind caught something else she said. That she probably could.

"Do you..." he hesitated, not sure it was a good idea to ask such a question. In the end, however, honesty was usually best. "Do you think that maybe, after you've gotten through this and feel whole again..." He trailed off, but she caught his meaning.

"I think it would be as easy as breathing to fall in love with you Carlisle," she whispered softly.

He felt his dead heart swell at her words. "Then I will wait for you, until you tell me not to."


	12. Chapter 12

The next week, Carlisle went to the hospital and resumed his job. Bella had mixed feelings about it, because it meant that she would see him less during the day. She had quickly become accustomed to seeing Carlisle every morning before school, and then every afternoon after. On the other hand, it meant he intended to stay, and had no immediate plans to leave.

He also began spending more time at his own house, which was probably a good thing. While she didn't mind his near constant presence, she knew that if it kept up much longer, Charlie would become incredibly suspicious. She also didn't want to become utterly dependent on Carlisle for her happiness, the way she had with Edward. Though she still loved him, and still missed him desperately, she recognized now that her dependence on him was rather unhealthy.

And so, though she still spent plenty of time with Carlisle, and he continued to spend the night with her, Bella began to spend an increasing amount of time on the Reservation as well. She had forgotten what it was like to just spend time with Jacob, how relaxing and fun it could be when she could worry a little less, act a little younger, and her last visit had reminded her of that.

Time went on, and slowly but surely she began to heal and feel more herself. She was well balanced between Carlisle and Jacob, it all depended on how she was feeling that particular day. If she just needed someone to talk to about everything and get things off her chest, Carlisle provided both open ears and a shoulder to lean or cry on as needed. If it was a day where she was feeling overwhelmed by the world in general or crushed by responsibilities, a few hours on the Res with Jacob was the perfect antidote.

Nevertheless, she still avoided thinking about him if she could. The nightmares never went away, never showed any signs of abating at all, and there were still times when the despair creeped up and threatened to suffocate her. Spending nearly all of her time with either Jacob or Carlisle didn't take away the feeling of abandonment, the thoughts reminding her that she wasn't good enough for him and never would be. She would still give almost anything to have him back, to have him still want her, but she understood that it wasn't going to happen. He didn't want her and never would, and that was something she had to accept. She hoped that someday she would be able to, that maybe, just maybe, she would be able to look back on their brief memories and smile. Right now, however, was not that time.

If her heart was not hurting over Edward, it was hurting over Carlisle and the pain she could see in his eyes every time he awoke her from a dream about Edward, the reminder that her heart still belonged to someone else. She knew that Jacob wanted more than friendship with her also, but there was something different about him. For one, he was only human. He would move on eventually, find a girlfriend and forget about the feelings he had for her now, as he was not unchanging the way Carlisle was. Unlike Jacob, Carlisle would be in love with her for the rest of his existence.

And there was something far less forgivable about hurting Carlisle. Perhaps it was the fact that she knew Carlisle's pain was so much more intense, so much more acute, than Jacob could even comprehend. Or perhaps it was the fact that he wouldn't push, wouldn't try to convince her or even try to win her affection. The fact that he seemed to both understand and accept that she couldn't be with someone right now, and yet still stayed by her because he knew she needed him, spoke of just how much he truly did love her. She had always known Carlisle had a very self-sacrificing nature, but this seemed to go above and beyond what she had come to expect even of him.

This same self-sacrificing nature became evident on a Saturday about a month and a half after Carlisle had come back to Forks.

...

Carlisle had been in his study in the big, lonely white house when he heard Bella's new truck turn off the highway and onto the driveway, and smiled to himself, knowing full well he was an idiot. Though he knew it would cause him pain, he couldn't help but be grateful for every minute, every hour that she gave him of her time. He was simply too far gone on her.

When Bella came up the porch, therefore, he pulled the door open before she could open it - he had told her not to bother knocking anymore - and immediately pulled her into his arms when he caught the expression on her face. His heart twisted itself into a knot, he was sure it was something to do with Edward, but he was prepared to help her regardless of how much it may hurt him.

"Bella," he said softly, "What is it honey?" He picked her up and flitted to the couch, sitting down and holding her on his lap as she fought for breath to speak.

"It's... Jake..." she managed to gasp out. His brow furrowed at the unexpected name, but the hand stroking her back did not break rhythm as he continued to soothe her. "He told me... not to come back."

"Why on earth would he say that?" He asked in true bewilderment.

She only cried harder, shaking her head back and forth. "I don't know," she told him. "He was so afraid of Sam and the other guys, he was terrified because he felt like they wanted him." Her breath was coming in gasps still, but she was starting to control it and the tears had finally started to slow.

"Why was he afraid of them?"

"Not really afraid of them, more like afraid of what they were up to, and why they wanted him. He hated that they were acting all high and mighty, that they called themselves 'protectors' and all this other garbage.."

She trailed off, but his mind stuck was stuck on one particular word. Protectors... Surely, it couldn't be...

"And it's just like what he described with Embry," she was saying. "He was sick for a while, he wouldn't talk to me or return my calls or anything. Finally I got sick of the silence and went to see him to see how he was and he's not even sick! He's up and walking around, acting all cold and calculating, like he's some big shot or super important or something. They got to him like he was afraid they would and I don't know what to do..."

Carlisle casted around desperately for a way to drop a hint to her, perhaps guide her to what he thought might be the truth, without actually breaking the treaty. His mind latched onto a conversation with Edward long ago, and he knew it was his only chance.

"Edward said that it was Jacob who told you what we are," he began carefully. "What all did he tell you about that day?"

Bella was brought up short by his sudden change of course. Her brow furrowed as she thought. "He told me some old tribe legends, about his great grandfather and the 'cold ones' that showed up that was actually you guys. He doesn't actually believe any of it, he was just trying to scare me," she finished imploringly. "He said something about telling me the story meant he broke a treaty or something, but he didn't believe in it."

He smiled reassuringly. "I know that, and I don't fault him for it. I would never call them to task for the ramblings of a teenager who doesn't know what he's doing."

"Wait, so was there a treaty?"

Carlisle hesitated before speaking, trying to think of what he should and shouldn't say. "Yes, there was. Still is, actually. All in all, it defines whose land is whose, that we will not trespass on the the other party's territory and that we will not reveal any of the other party's secrets. This is also where it gets sketchy for me, because, though I am quite sure I know why your friend Jacob is acting the way he is, I cannot tell you."

"But if he already told me about you-"

"A teenager who does not believe his tribe's legends cannot be faulted, nor would I dream of doing so. But it would be very different for me, not only being fully aware of the treaty but having been the one that made it." She nodded reluctantly, and he knew that she knew he was right. He wished he could tell her that he believed he had joined the pack, but it was not within his rights. Suddenly, though, something else occurred to him.

"What were the legends he told you?" Carlisle asked carefully.

She sighed. "I'm not sure any more. I know there was more than the story about your family, but that's the only part I was really interested in. I just can't remember the rest," she said mournfully.

"I can't tell you the truth, but I can tell you that if you manage to remember the legends he told you, in those legends you will find the truth. And I can tell you one more thing," he said carefully. She looked up at him with wide eyes, hanging on his every word. "If I am correct, his sudden distance is neither his fault, nor his decision. Just keep that in mind, alright?" He asked softly.

She nodded, and he swiped gently at her cheeks where the tears were beginning to dry. With a smile, he kissed each cheekbone directly under the eye, and pulled her back into his chest, unwilling as ever to let her go.


	13. Chapter 13

By the time Jacob's voice came through the darkness, Bella was already sound asleep. Clearly though, the boy had caught his scent and knew he was with Bella.

"Hey leech, I'm coming up," came Jacob's scathing voice from the forest. He sighed internally at the crude nickname, but otherwise ignored it. He was young and biased by his own tribe's legends, and Carlisle couldn't fault him for that.

"Very well," Carlisle said evenly. He knew that he would still be heard. He didn't know much about the wolves, though he wanted to, but he did know that their senses were nearly as keen as his own while wolves, and not much less so in human form. Silently, Carlisle worked himself free of Bella's embrace to sit next to her on the bed instead; she had curled into him particularly tightly after the events of the evening.

He heard running footsteps through the edge of the forest and across the lawn, and saw the quiver of the tree branches when Jacob began to climb. Within moments, the huge boy was swinging himself agiley into the room, giving Carlisle a look of mild disgust. It was with his usual patience, though, that Carlisle greeted the boy.

"Carlisle Cullen," he introduced politely, holding out his hand. He didn't expect Jacob to take it, and was therefore surprised when, after a few moments' hesitation, he did just that.

"Jacob Black," he returned evenly, pulling his hand back just a moment too quickly.

It was with mild surprise that Carlisle looked up at Jacob once more, seeing the resemblance now he knew what to look for.

"You look very like Ephraim, Jacob. If Bella's words about you are anything to go by, you too possess his kind spirit." Carlisle chose his words carefully, knowing that if he was right, Jacob would not be able to hide his guilt, and was not disappointed.

"I haven't lived up to it today," he muttered sullenly. "I promised her I'd never hurt her, and look where I am now."

Carlisle smiled reassuringly. "You're here to apologize to your friend for hurting her, and to make it up to her, am I correct?"

"Well yeah, that's true. Sam doesn't want me here, but I can't just leave it like that. I have to be quick though or he'll wonder."

"So you're not the Alpha?" Carlisle asked in confusion.

"No. I don't even want to be a part of this pack, let alone lead it, Sam can have it," came Jacob's response. "Sam laid down an order that none of us can tell anyone without his express permission, and there's no way around it. I don't know how I can apologize without giving her the truth, she's going to hate me."

"I said what I could without breaching the treaty when she came over earlier. I told her that I was forbidden to give any details, but that I suspected your sudden retreat was neither your fault nor your choice, and she seemed to accept that," Carlisle told him. He could see the boy was extremely upset he had to keep things from Bella, and he could see how much she cared about him. He knew it wasn't romantic, and doubted it ever would be, but they were good friends. He didn't want to see Bella lose that companionship.

"Thank you bl-, um, Carlisle," Jacob stuttered. Carlisle couldn't quite stop the wry smile that curved one side of his mouth upward.

"No problem. I'll step out while you talk to her, but I was wondering how far you wanted me to go."

Jacob gave him a confused look. "Why?"

"Because you're new and her safety is my highest priority, but if you're confident you can control your temper and keep from hurting her, I'll take you at your word," Carlisle told him honestly.

Jacob's eyebrows rose in surprise. "Wait, so you'd trust me if I said that I would be okay?"

Carlisle nodded. "I don't see any reason not to. I know you care very deeply for Bella. Enough that if you felt she was in danger, I highly doubt you would put her at risk just for the sake of your own pride."

Jacob seemed momentarily lost for words. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, I guess," he said uncertainly. "Um, if you wanted to wait just out of range of a normal conversation, but close enough to hear raised voices, I think that would work best."

Carlisle nodded and turned to the bed where Bella was still fast asleep. Kneeling down by her head, he gently shook her until she opened her eyes in confusion. "What?" She asked blearily.

He felt his heart flip slightly in his chest, she was adorable in her waking moments. A grin split his face as he looked at her, gently helping her sit up. Her eyes were half closed, and she still hadn't noticed Jacob. "Did I have another nightmare? I'm sorry..." she said softly, tucking her head into the crook of his neck and wrapping her arms around his waist.

If he could have blushed, he would have been, knowing Jacob was watching the whole thing. "No Bella, that's not it. Jacob is here, he wants to talk to you," he told her softly.

She started at Jacob's name, looking over his shoulder until she found the friend in question.

"Jake?" She asked in confusion. Carlisle knew he was not the only one who could hear the hurt in her voice, but he was quite sure he was the only person who could literally hear her tear ducts swelling, ready to overflow.

"It's me Bells," came Jacob's voice. "Really dropped the ball today huh?"

Bella made to stand up and he did so with her, dropping a lingering kiss to her forehead before stepping toward the window. "I'm going to let you have a few minutes alone," he told her. "I'll be back as soon as you want me." She nodded at him thankfully, and he leapt through the window without another word.

...

Jacob watched the bloodsucker, Carlisle, he reminded himself, disappear into the forest, feeling wrong footed. On one hand, vampires were evil. They weren't human, they weren't even alive and their existence went against nature. But there was just something different about the leader that made him hard to hate. Even when he really tried, he just couldn't quite make himself hate the vampire. He didn't have the same problem with any of the others, particularly the one who'd left Bella alone in the forest. That one,  _Edward_ , he thought scathingly, was extremely easy to hate. But the doctor was a different story.

Jacob shook himself mentally at the irony. A vampire doctor. Now that was really something. If it weren't for the eyes he'd say the paras-  _Carlisle_  did it for the easy access to blood, but the gold eyes proved that wasn't the case. And he'd heard enough stories to know that if human blood was spilled around a vampire, it was almost impossible for them not to attack instantly. That could only mean that he'd spent a lot of years training himself, which, he had to admit, could not be easy.

Jacob really shook his head this time, the thoughts were making his brain hurt. It was wired into his genes to hate every last one of them, but there was something insubstantial about Carlisle that made it nearly impossible. And then there was the way he looked at Bella, when he woke her and before he jumped through the window. Maybe it was because he had his own pathetic crush on her, but the way the guy felt about Bella was written all over his unnaturally white face.

...

Bella watched Jacob think silently, wondering what could be on his mind. Finally his attention found her again, and he spoke first. Predictably, his first words made her blush.

"He's so far gone on you," Jacob chortled.

"I know," she said wearily. "It's way too soon though, for anyone. But he's sweet."

Jacob chuckled. "I don't know if I'd go quite that far, but even for a leech he's hard to hate. I want to, but I can't do it."

Bella swatted at him. "So don't try to," she suggested.

"Fair enough," Jacob said evenly. "I hate your ex-parasite enough for both anyway."

Bella's eyes fell to the floor, and her joking smile vanished. "Jake..." She said softly, not finishing her sentence.

"I'm sorry Bells," he said. "Shoulda kept that one to myself. That's not why I'm here anyway. I'm here to explain, or try to anyway. Well first I'm here to apologize. I promised you I would never hurt you like that, and I did. I'm sorry Bella. Can you forgive me?"

"Of course Jake," she said quickly. "I was angry at first but Carlisle told me he didn't think it was your fault, that you didn't want to. Is that true?"

Jacob sighed heavily. "Yeah, it is. I can't say a word. It's forbidden."

Bella nodded. "Yeah, Carlisle basically said that too. He said he couldn't give me any details, but..." She trailed off, remembering something else he had said. "He asked me about the day you told me about vampires, back before you knew they existed. I said you told me some old legends, because you didn't believe them. He made it sound like you might have told me back then. Did you?"

Jacob grinned as he remembered. "Yeah I did! Do you remember them?"

Bella shook her head sadly. "No, I don't. I was asking because Carlisle said that if I could remember what you told me, I would probably figure out what's going on with you."

"Damnit," Jacob swore. "Well try Bella, please. I need you to know this. It would make everything so much easier if you knew. God I owe him," Jacob said ruefully. "I don't think I would have thought of that on my own." Jacob took a step forward and enveloped her in his too hot embrace.

"Jeez Jake, you're burning up!"

"It's a-" he broke off sharply, looking like he was being choked. "See? I literally can't say it. But it's just part of... this. It's normal for me now." He put both hands on her shoulders, looking into her eyes. "Please try Bella. Promise me you'll try."

She nodded. "Of course Jake. I promise I'll do everything I can."

He turned toward the window, and pulled up short. He didn't quite meet her eyes as he spoke. "And..." he sighed again. "If you don't want to see me any more, I understand."

She gave him a confused look. "Why on earth wouldn't I want to see you anymore?"

"I can't say. But if it happens, just call me. Okay?" He looked so dejected that she couldn't help but hug him once more, putting her arms around his huge waist.

"I promise, but that's not going to happen. You're my best friend Jake," she told him softly. Jacob nodded, before heading toward the window once more.

"Night Bells. See you soon I hope," he said meaningfully.

"See you soon Jake," she told him confidently. She would figure it out. She would do everything she possibly could.

...

It was a scant ten seconds later that Carlisle jumped through her window once more, smiling as he put his hands on her shoulders.

"How did it go?" He asked kindly.

"Really well actually. You were right, he told me that day on the beach. I just have to remember the stories he told me," she muttered.

"You will," he told her confidently. "I know you will."

She smiled at him, happy for his confidence in her. "Thank you Carlisle."

He gave her a smile in return and tugged her close, sighing happily as her arms wound around him. His arms were secure around her, and she was all-too-happy to sink gratefully into his embrace. Jacob was her friend, of course, but there was something subtly different about being held by Carlisle this way. Not just because he was in love with her, although that had something to do with it. There was just something quietly unnamable about the feeling it gave her, a warm feeling in the center of her chest when he reached out to her that made her reluctant to let go of him.

When he eventually pulled back from her, she looked up at him and was shocked at the way her stomach swooped when she looked into his light gold eyes. He caught her moment of hesitation, and she knew he heard the way her heart skipped a beat when he stroked one hand softly down her face.

Her heart began to pound as he leaned slowly down to her, and she felt her eyes falling closed of their own accord as his hand cupped her chin. Her breath came in fast, shallow pants as she waited in painful anticipation.

Finally, the pressure she expected came, so hesitant and sweet that it made her feel like crying. She let her hands find his shoulders, one grazing across the back of his neck as she hesitantly kissed him back.

Carlisle was nothing if not a gentleman, however, and she knew that he could tell she wasn't ready for anything more. "Oh Bella," he whispered, so softly she almost didn't hear him. "You are the most precious thing in my world." He leaned back and looked her in the eye then, "There is nothing I would not do for you. And if it means waiting centuries to kiss you again, I will do so gladly."

He stroked her face once more, and she leaned into his touch. "Thank you Carlisle. You're so much more than I deserve."

"Oh sweet Bella," he sighed in her ear. "You have no idea just how backwards you have that."

With those words, he scooped her up and carried her to the bed, where he held her tenderly through the night, whispering the word 'wolves' in her ear periodically until the dream finally came to her.


	14. Chapter 14

Bella awoke early Sunday morning with a start. She'd had a nightmare, but it wasn't the usual one, which surprised her. It was the one she'd had the night she found out the Cullens were-

"Oh my God!" Bella exclaimed suddenly, staring wide eyed at Carlisle. He raised his eyebrows in question, though he had an idea what it was about. "Jacob," she said, "he's a…" She shook her head, evidently trying to wrap her head around it. "He's a werewolf," she said quietly.

"In a sense, yes," Carlisle told her. "Although the Quileute wolves adhere to werewolf canon even less than we adhere to vampire canon. In all honesty, they could be described far more accurately as shape shifters. The form of a wolf just happens to come from their ancestors."

A disturbing thought occurred to her then, and Carlisle could see the wariness in her expression. "Are they the ones killing people?" She asked him softly.

Carlisle gave her an odd look. "I hadn't heard of anything like that," he said, sounding worried. "But no, I can promise you that they are not. Remember what you told me about them last night? What they call themselves?"

Bella thought back carefully, and finally it dawned on her. "Oh, protectors. Hall monitors on steroids, Jake called them. Okay." Her brow furrowed. "Then what is killing people?"

"I don't know," he said. "Where did you hear about it?"

"Charlie's mentioned it a few times," Bella told him. "Something about a wild animal killing people in the woods around here, and everyone's been talking about seeing huge bears... Wait, is that really the wolves? Jacob and Sam and them?"

Carlisle nodded. "Yes to the wolves, I know for a fact they're the ones everyone thinks are bears. But I hadn't heard about people being killed..." He trailed off, seeming troubled. "Come on, I want to talk to your father about that."

Bella was confused, but kept it to herself as Carlisle pulled them both to their feet. He saw her worry, and pulled her in for a hug. She smiled to herself as she wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his chest. In the last month and a half since Carlisle had come back, she had learned quickly that he was a very affectionate person. It was something she liked a lot about him, because Edward had always been so hesitant about any sort of physical contact and Carlisle gave it so freely. And she suspected that Carlisle wouldn't have the same problems Edward did with a physical relationship...

Bella shook herself mentally, she absolutely could not let herself start thinking like that. Carlisle deserved someone who wasn't still aching over someone else, and she refused to give him anything less. She had started to fall for him, and she knew it, but she wasn't about to treat him so callously. He deserved every part of her, including the part that was still pining over Edward. She was hopeful, though, that someday soon she would be able to truly say yes to him.

...

It was a mark of how much time Carlisle had been spending with Bella that Charlie's eyebrows barely raised when he saw Carlisle coming down the stairs from Bella's room at seven thirty in the morning.

"Carlisle," Charlie greeted evenly. "How are you this morning?"

"I had a question for you actually," Carlisle said, sitting on the couch with Bella. "Bella had mentioned some people getting killed out in the woods, and that you thought it was animal attacks. I was wondering if you could give me a few details on that."

Charlie muted the T.V. and turned to face Carlisle. "In truth, the bodies have been a little too brutalized to really tell much. Necks ripped open, bones crushed, that sort of thing."

Carlisle gave Charlie a sharp look. "Less blood than there should be? Maybe the M.E. thinking it soaked into the ground?"

Charlie gave him a look of surprise then. "Yeah, that's what he said actually. Why, what are you-" Charlie cut off sharply, finally understanding what Carlisle was getting at. "You don't think it's more of..."

"My kind," Carlisle finished for him. "And yes, I do. Next time you get a body that looks like that, have the M.E. turn the examination over to me. It's fairly common for those of us who hunt the traditional way to tear open at least one of the major arteries, it creates a plausible explanation for the severe blood loss."

"Wait," Bella said sharply. "Dad, how much do you know?"

"Everything," Carlisle answered resignedly. "The clue that Billy gave him was enough that he was able to put it together."

Bella gave Carlisle a horrified look, and he could see the tears welling in her eyes.

"Bella," he said quickly. "Calm down. It's not as set in stone as it seems. As long as I don't personally touch Aro's hand in the next thirty or forty years, everything will be fine."

Bella recognized the name from one of the many times Carlisle had told her more about their world. He had told her all about the Volturi, Aro and his talent. He'd also told her of Alec and Jane, Felix, Demetri and Renata. He'd explained the transformation in detail as well, proving without even trying that he meant it when he said he would turn her if she asked. Edward had always been adamant that she never know anything, and she knew it was because he didn't plan on her ever being a part of his world. The thought still hurt, but it was slowly beginning to lessen. The longer she spent in such close contact with Carlisle, the more things she could recognize about Edward that proved he didn't love her the way he said he did.

Carlisle and her dad waited patiently while she thought of it all, and she took a shaky breath when she came back to herself.

"Are you sure?" She asked Carlisle warily.

He smiled reassuringly at her. "I can't think of any other way he would find out. We're the only ones who know that he knows. And I've already told you what I think of Aro and you," he reminded her. Bella did remember that. Carlisle had told her that, because Aro's gift was so similar to Edward's, he doubted Aro would be able to read her any more than Edward could.

"Anyway," Carlisle said, bringing them back to the conversation at hand. "Have any more of these attacks sent to me, and I'll handle things accordingly. And also, those aren't bears in the woods either. I have an... agreement of sorts with the Quileute tribe that prevents me from giving any details, but I promise they're not a danger to anyone. In fact, if it is my kind committing the murders, you'll want them around." Charlie gave him a confused look. "Ask Billy for any details, I'm not going to lower myself to his level," Carlisle said, sounding irritated.

"Speaking of," Bella responded, "What are you going to do about that?"

"I'll have to meet with the elders and see if we can come to an agreement. I'm hoping that if I play nice, I may get my own concession made, which I'll need unless you change your mind," he told her, hoping that his meaning went over Charlie's head. Unfortunately, it did not.

"Change your mind about..." Charlie trailed off, looking at Bella. She fidgited uncomfortably, and he didn't blame her.

"Bella has expressed a wish to join my family," Carlisle said smoothly. "I can only imagine how repellent the idea is to you, however it is no one's choice but her own. Although as accident prone as Bella is, you may actually prefer it," he said with a grin. Bella shot him a dirty look, but didn't disagree with him.

"And why is that?" Charlie asked him seriously, looking like he was searching for an argument.

"Our kind is very nearly indestructible. Not being truly alive, there is only one way to kill us. If Bella were to become one of us, not only would she be just as graceful as Alice, the only human weapon that would have a chance of harming her would be a nuclear blast. And even that, I would imagine, would require close proximity."

"So if I were to get out my gun and shoot you right now..." Charlie said.

Carlisle laughed aloud. "Well the obvious answer for me is I would grab it effortlessly midair. But to answer what you're asking, it would simply ricochet. Once it did, I would grab it before it could harm you or Bella."

Charlie's eyebrows rose almost to his hairline. "You're that fast?" He asked incredulously.

Neither Bella nor Charlie had even comprehended Carlisle had gotten up before he returned and stood in front of Charlie, holding out a bottle of water. A moment later, they all heard the fridge door close.

"Holy shit," Charlie muttered, taking the offered drink from Carlisle.

"Now imagine being on one of their backs while they run that fast," Bella said sourly. "It's terrifying."

"Edward it quite a bit faster than me," Carlisle reminded her with a smile, sitting down next to Bella once more. "He could run the length of the block and back before you noticed he was gone, it's quite incredible."

"What else have you got up your sleeve?" Charlie asked, sounding fascinated.

"Our strength is on par with our speed. In my entire existence as a vampire, I have never come across something I would say challenged me strength-wise, apart from the time I indulged Emmett in an arm wrestling competition," he said with a laugh.

Bella laughed along at the image in her head. "Do I need to ask how that went?"

"I fared about as well as you would," he told her with a grin. "The only difference is that my arm didn't shatter the way yours would."

"How do you control it?" Charlie asked curiously.

"A lot of practice," Carlisle told him. "As strong as we are, it would be only too easy to grab someone like this," he explained, wrapping his hand around Bella's forearm, "and crush the bones to powder with just a twitch of my hand." Carlisle could see the curiosity and fascination burning in Charlie's gaze. "Just a second," Carlisle said, before literally disappearing out the door. A second later he was back with a large rock.

Carlisle held it out to Charlie, resting it flat on his palm. With Charlie watching, he closed his fist around it. With hardly any effort, the rock was reduced to gravel. He opened his hand once more, revealing the tiny crushed pebbles. Carlisle couldn't help but grin at the other man's stunned expression, before flitting to the door and tossing the remnants outside.

Carlisle returned to Bella's side once more, and remained quiet as Charlie chewed over everything he'd heard and seen, eyeing Bella speculatively the entire time. Finally, he spoke.

"Well... As much as the idea freaks me out... Bells, you're my little girl," he said gruffly, making both of them blush a deep crimson. "I've always wanted you safe, what's best for you. Maybe..." Charlie sighed, and Carlisle could see the ideas warring in his mind. "Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea, if you did it the way they do."

Bella smiled, clearly touched. "I can't imagine doing it any other way," she said, shooting Carlisle an admiring look.

Charlie turned his attention to Carlisle next. "Normally I'd blow a gasket at just the idea of it, but you made a damn good case. And don't think for a moment I missed what you were doing there," he muttered.

Carlisle inclined his head. "I wouldn't dream of it. I knew you would be highly upset at the idea if I didn't say anything, and given how stubborn Bella is, it would only have caused a rift between you. I knew that if I could show you the benefits of her becoming one of us, it would, in all likelihood, sway you."

"At least you're honest," Charlie said. "Bella, could you go upstairs or something for a minute? I'd like to have a private word with Carlisle." She gave him a look of surprise, but complied. Carlisle listened carefully as she went up the steps to her room, and heard her put on headphones, with some heavy metal music playing.

"Okay, she's got some music on. What would you like to speak to me about?"

Charlie gave him a long look, and Carlisle had a sneaking suspicion he knew what was on the chief's mind. With a sigh, Charlie began. "Normally I think of you as an equal, because I know that even though you're technically only twenty-three, you've got me beat in a lot of ways. I have a lot of respect for you and that hasn't changed, nor do I expect it to.

"But right now I don't want to talk to the three hundred-some-year-old doctor. Right now I want to talk to the twenty-three year old man who's got a serious crush on my daughter."

Carlisle couldn't help but duck his head slightly in embarassment. For the first time in over three hundred years, the lack of blood rushing to his face actually wrong footed him.

...

Charlie watched Carlisle's reaction carefully, and had to hold back a chuckle. He had wondered if the mature, civilized town doctor persona would hold in the face of his confrontation, but with a few words he had reduced Carlisle to the twenty-three year old he could tell was still there. It was a refreshing thought, to know that this person still existed. If he wanted to be with Bella, he would have to be able to relate to her age. Carlisle was a good man, there was no denying it. But that didn't change the fact that Bella was his only daughter, and it was his responsibility to quiz any boys who wanted her.

...

Carlisle composed himself as best he could before responding. "What would you like to know?" He asked carefully.

"Well first off I want to make sure you know that this isn't the time," Charlie said sternly. "I know she's been doing a lot better but I know damn well she isn't over him yet, far from it. I don't want her getting all mixed up and then getting heartbroken all over again. Are we clear?"

"Of course," Carlisle said quickly. "I've said much the same and so has she. She's not whole right now, and it wouldn't be fair to ask her for anything like that now. I've told her how I feel, and I've told her more than once that I'm willing to wait as long as she needs. And if it never comes to pass, I can handle that. She's a special woman, Charlie. I know that, and I only want the best for her. If it takes another three hundred years, it will be more than worth it."

Charlie nodded, looking relieved. "That's good to hear. I just want to make sure she's in good hands. And if things work out, well... You have my permission, blessing, whatever it is. Just promise me you'll take care of her, even if she does become one of you."

"I will protect her with my own life. I swear it," Carlisle told him sincerely. And there was absolutely no question in his voice. Charlie knew, then and there, that Carlisle would give his too-long life for Bella. And that was all he needed to know.


	15. Chapter 15

Bella had been ready to take off for La Push when he and Charlie had gotten done talking, but Carlisle reminded her that there also needed to be a discussion about the treaty, and suggested that it all be said at once. Carlisle had called the Black house to discuss it, but had been told by Billy that the person he actually needed to talk to was Sam. Carlisle hadn't given Sam many details, wanting to give someone else the chance to explain. Nevertheless, Sam had agreed bring Harry, Jacob, Billy and Old Quil Ateara to Carlisle's home after much convincing. It had also been decided that both Bella and Charlie would attend as well.

So, at precisely six that evening, the five Quileutes had shown up on Carlisle's porch. Looking at the size of the car they had taken, Carlisle was quite sure that Sam and Jacob had run as wolves. Carlisle had also offered to cook dinner for the group, but predictably, Sam had declined, although respectfully. Charlie was seated in a recliner in the living room already, looking incredibly tense. It would be the first time he had seen or spoken to either Billy or Harry since the events of Carlisle's first day back.

Carlisle pulled the door open just as the Quileutes reached it. "Good evening," he said civilly, stepping aside to allow them in. He knew they would be tense, and he honestly wanted to do his best to put them at ease. At least they were in good company. He was the only one in the house without a pulse. "Charlie and Bella are just through here," he told them, leading the group into the living room.

Bella had already claimed the loveseat, directly to the right of Charlie. Carlisle took the open place next to her, inviting the guests to the other two couches in the room.

"Does anyone want anything to eat or drink?" He invited, trying to act as human as possible. At least Charlie was being helpful.

"You got beer?" He asked curiously, sounding as though he didn't expect it.

Carlisle nodded, standing and making his way to the kitchen. "I picked some up earlier today," he told them. "Anyone else?"

"Hell with it, I'll take one," Billy said after a moment. Harry and Old Quil nodded in agreement, and Carlisle went to retrieve the drinks. When he handed them out, the atmosphere seemed to lighten a bit, though not much. None of them - that knew - had quite forgotten why they were here.

"Well, we may as well get started," Sam started off. It threw Carlisle a bit, to have someone as young as Sam be the leader of their council when there were those like Billy, Harry and Quil on it as well, but he ignored it. "Personally, I'd like to know exactly why we're here. Carlisle just told me we needed to discuss the treaty, because it has technically been breached by one of us." There was no mistaking the rebuke in Sam's tone, even if it wasn't directed at any one person yet. "Who wants to tell me what's going?"

"Personally, I think that Charlie should speak first, seeing as he's the closest we can get to unbiased," Carlisle suggested. "Charlie, why don't you tell everyone what happened the first day I came back?"

"What about it?" He asked, sounding confused.

"Just summarize what happened from when I showed up to when you went to sleep that night."

Charlie nodded. "I can do that I suppose. Well, Carlisle showed up at about two-thirty in the afternoon, I'd taken the day off since it'd been a slow week in general, so I was there to let him in. He said he wanted to talk about Bella, check in and see how she was doing. I told him the truth, that she hadn't been doing well and how I was at a loss as to what to do. I told him how..." Charlie shot Bella a slightly apologetic look then, "how helpless I felt watching her waste away like that." He took a couple deep breaths, and stumbled on.

"Well, Bella came home and once she noticed Carlisle she, well, broke down I guess. So he carried her over to the couch and helped her ride it out. It took about fifteen minutes and she fell asleep right there, so I invited him to stay so he could take care of her. He got comfortable so Bella could rest and I went to call you guys," he said to Billy and Harry, "to tell you that I was gonna come up to the res instead, but then you pulled up out front.

"Well anyway, everyone agreed to be civil so the three of us shot the shit and watched the a couple of games. Kinda forgot you were there after a while," he told Carlisle apologetically. "Well Billy noticed he'd fallen asleep, er- that he'd feigned sleep anyway, and mimed writing something to get me to find a pen and paper. So I did and I gave it to him, and he wrote out a note, asking if I had a stethoscope. I nodded yes and he wrote that I should go get it."

Carlisle kept his face impassive, but Jacob, Sam and Old Quil weren't doing as well. Quil looked annoyed, but unsurprised. Sam was giving Billy a stern glare, but Jacob looked outraged. Honestly, Carlisle couldn't blame him.

"I came back with it, I'd gotten it a couple years before when I'd been having some rhythm troubles. Anyway, Billy motioned to use it on Carlisle, so I moved Bella's arm off his chest and tried to check his heartbeat. When I didn't hear anything, I thought there was something wrong with it. Billy told me to use it on myself, and it worked so I knew something was up.

"I, well honestly I freaked out. Carlisle got up and told those two to leave so he could do damage control, and Harry chewed Billy out for being a fool as they left. Carlisle helped me calm down, and after that we talked for a few minutes. He said he couldn't tell me the details, but I could tell that he was telling the truth about what he did say. I've known Carlisle for a good couple of years and I've never had a reason not to trust him. So when Bella stuck up for him, I accepted it and just told him to make sure my daughter didn't get hurt.

"Nothing much happened then until I went to bed, and got to puzzling it all over. I was thinking about the heartbeat thing when it dawned on me that that's what you would describe as undead. Once I made that leap, everything fell into place. I went back down for a beer and... confronted... Carlisle, and he told me I was right. He warned me that knowing the truth could cost me my life and I told him that I'd signed my life away when I took my job. We spent a good amount of time talking, and Carlisle told me his back story.

"After a bit I realized Bella was due to start screaming herself out of a nightmare any minute, so we both went upstairs. Carlisle noticed exactly when it started, and managed to calm her down again without waking her up. I'd never been able to do that, and that's what made my decision for me. Whatever freaky, supernatural bullshit is going on, my priority is Bella's wellbeing. She's come miles and miles since he's been around, and that's what matters to me. I'm okay with anyone who can take care of her, even if they are v-" Charlie sucked in a huge breath, evidently trying to give himself the willpower to spit the word out, most likely for the first time since he learned the truth. "Even if they are... v- vampires," he said,shuddering visibly.

Bella held her hand out to Charlie, and he took it gratefully. "You'll get used to it," she promised him.

"I don't know about that kid," he returned.

Carlisle's eyes turned to Sam as soon as he started to speak. It was evident immediately that he was angry, though he controlled it well. Jacob was openly furious, glaring at his father with disgust.

"Harry," Sam began, "Do you have anything to add?"

"Just that I wish Billy had confided in me about his brilliant plan before he clued Charlie in. I had no idea what was going on until Charlie handed me the notepad and went off to search for the stethoscope. I told him he was being a fool, and that it violated the treaty. He said something along the lines of, as long as it wasn't outright exposure, it wasn't doing any harm because Charlie needed to know."

Sam turned to Carlisle next. "Is there anything you'd like to add?"

"I just wanted to clarify a couple of things," Carlisle said evenly. "Though I was not sleeping, as our kind do not have the ability, I was pretending so for Charlie's sake. My family and I put forth tremendous effort into the human façade, in an attempt to blend in. As such, I could not see what was going on around me. I knew that Billy was suggesting something to Charlie that would make him wary, but until I felt the stethoscope I didn't realize the degree to which he was willing to go. If I had known that was the intent, I would have pretended to wake up, thus preventing the whole scenario from taking place. As it was, I felt it was prudent to know what Billy had suggested, and there was only one way to find that out. By the time I knew what was going on, preventative measures would only have aroused further suspicion."

Sam nodded. "I was wondering about that, thank you for clarifying. Billy," he said sharply, turning sharply. "Is there anything you would like to add or dispute?"

Billy shook his head slowly, and Carlisle could see the remorse in his expression. He would very much like to tell them not to worry about it, but he needed the concession it might give him.

"Just say it son," Billy said resignedly with a glance at Jacob.

"How could you?" He burst out immediately. "If anyone should have known how important it was to keep your mouth shut, it was you and you just couldn't do it. Now we're the ones to break the treaty. How could you do that?" Jacob finished abruptly, breathing heavily, though his glare had subsided now he had said his piece.

"You're right Jake. If anyone should be held accountable for keeping these things to themselves it's me, and I screwed it all up. I'm sorry," he said to the room at large.

Carlisle nodded, but stayed silent. Sam turned to him once more. "Well, it wasn't designed to work this way, but if there's anything you'd like changed, barring your hunting habits of course, now would be the time to mention it. We are honor bound to live up to our word and we did not. As such, it is our duty to award you a concession for the trouble we have caused you."

Carlisle nodded, he had been hoping for this. "Normally I would not make any requests of you, as everyone makes mistakes. I do, however, have one small favor to ask of you." Sam nodded once, indicating to go on. Carlisle took a deep breath, and made his proposal. "Bella has expressed numerous times that she would like to join our family. I confess I want this as well, though only if it is her choice. I would ask your permission to change her at a time she chooses. In addition," he said quickly, seeing the way Sam was controlling his expression, "I would like to add that Charlie has given me his blessing for such a future."

All eyes in the room turned to Charlie, the Quileutes' in astonishment. "Is this true?" Sam asked Charlie sternly.

Charlie looked a bit uncomfortable, but there was no doubting the sincerity of his words. "Carlisle told me a bit about them earlier today," he said carefully. "And even if the idea scares me, I can't deny that I would worry a lot less about Bella if I knew she was all but indestructible. Just the fact that Renée and I accepted last year's hotel story without a thought proves that she should probably go forward with anything that will make her less fragile," he said with a chuckle.

There were laughs around the room at this, and Bella blushed a deep crimson that made his heart flip. The atmosphere quickly turned serious once more.

"Bella," Sam said. "Is this truly what you want for yourself?" There was no mistaking the shock in his voice, but Carlisle was grateful he was being as fair as he was.

"Without a doubt," she answered him immediately. "I've never felt like I really... belonged anywhere. And for the first time, I do and that's here. And I can promise you here and now that I will adhere to their diet. I've heard stories about the first year, but I trust Carlisle," she told them. "Please Sam," she said softly. "If you can't do it for them, then please do it for me."

Sam took a deep breath, and looked at each of the men surrounding him individually. Quil and Harry seemed to agree with little hesitation, and Billy nodded his own assent with a sad expression. Sam's final look was to Jacob. Understandably, he was upset.

"And you're absolutely sure Bella," Jacob asked.

"I am one hundred percent sure, Jacob. I want this."

Jacob turned to Carlisle next. "And you promise to take care of her? And to do your best to keep her from killing humans?" He asked seriously.

Carlisle's response was immediate. "I will do everything in my power."

With a sigh, Jacob nodded his own assent. "Seems fair to me," he said.

With the other's opinions given, Sam turned to Carlisle. "It is decided then. I, Samuel Uley, Chief of the Quileute tribe and Alpha of the Quileute Wolf Pack, hereby grant you, Carlisle Cullen, permission to transform Isabella Swan into a vampire, described in our own legends as the Cold One."

"Thank you," Carlisle said gratefully. "I swear to you that we do not go back on our word lightly."

"We will hold you to that," Sam told him as he stood. Carlisle stood as well, and the two men shook hands.

"I would not expect any less of you."


	16. Chapter 16

The meeting was just breaking up when Carlisle's head turned toward the glass wall in curiosity, evidently having heard something no one else noticed yet. His brow furrowed as he concentrated on what he was hearing. After a moment, Sam and Jacob turned their heads the same direction as they picked up whatever Carlisle had heard.

"One of your own?" Sam asked Carlisle.

"No, the pattern isn't familiar," he said nervously. Carlisle turned to the room at large. "I hear another one of us coming," he said quickly. "Back up over here against the far wall," he told them, motioning to a corner opposite the door. Quickly, Bella stood and grabbed her father's wrist, dragging him with her as Harry pushed Billy back with them, joined by Quil.

Suddenly, Carlisle's head snapped back around. Speaking so quickly she could barely make out his words, he instructed Sam and Jacob. "Don't fight it and don't draw attention to yourselves! Fall back and protect everyone else, let me handle this one. The footsteps sound like a newborn hunting, and they are different and far more dangerous than the rest of us. Guard everyone else, don't phase, don't get involved with it unless I'm down!"

His warning to the wolves had cost him the precious seconds it would have taken to bring the inevitable fight outside, and a blurred shape shot through - literally through - the front door and shattered it to pieces as Jacob and Sam posed themselves in front of the group like bodyguards. The vampire - a girl, by the looks of the long, auburn hair - crashed into Carlisle with the sound of boulders hitting, and snarls erupted as the fight ensued.

Bella couldn't make out what was going on, the two vampires were moving far too quickly, and they were also obscured by the huge shapes of Jacob and Sam standing directly in front of them. As she watched in terrified fascination, she suddenly became aware of something crushing her hand. A glance proved it to be Charlie's, crushing her own instinctively. She looked up at him and saw his eyes were wide with terror as he watched. Bella squeezed his arm reassuringly with her free hand, twisting the trapped one as she did so. Charlie let her hand loose quickly before looking back to the fight in front of him.

When Bella looked back she was shocked to see that Carlisle hadn't gained or lost any ground. Fear gripped her as a horrifying thought occurred to her. Carlisle might actually lose this fight. He had told her once that a newborn's strength was many times that of a mature vampire, and she could see what he meant. Every time Carlisle seemed to have gotten the girl into a good hold, she slipped or broke free of him. Bella felt tears fill her eyes as she watched, wishing desperately there was anything she could do to help.

And suddenly, a memory came to her. In her mind, she saw six vampires, all with eyes riveted on the blood pulsing out of her arm, and an idea presented itself. The cut the glass had given her had bled enough to distract even Edward momentarily, and she knew that a moment was all Carlisle needed. Thanking her lucky stars that her father was an avid fisherman, she turned to him and tugged his arm desperately.

"Dad!" She hissed quietly. "I need your keys!"

He gave her a look of confusion, but fished them out of his pocket nonetheless. Her fingers fumbled through them until she found what she was looking for - a small, two inch mini pocket knife. Bella flipped open the blade and yanked her arm out of the sleeve of her jacket, revealing a plain short sleeved shirt and unprotected skin.

Charlie's hand wrapped around the wrist holding the knife suddenly. "What do you think you're doing?" He hissed at her frantically.

"Distracting her," she whispered back. She could see the line of the scar from her birthday, still a puckered pink line, down her forearm. Without a second thought, she pressed the blade down hard into the crook of her elbow, grunting slightly at the pain and fighting the instinct to draw her hand back.

Bella managed to make an almost four inch gash in her forearm before she dropped the knife and focused very, very hard on the fight in front of her, lest she pass out.

The girl had frozen momentarily as soon as the blood had begun to gush from the wound, and that moment was all Carlisle needed. She had only just started to lunge for Bella when Carlisle wrapped his arm around her neck, obviously ready to twist her head completely off her shoulders.

In the exact same moment, however, two more shapes shot through the door. Bella knew a moment of pure shock as Jasper and Alice took the strange female by the arms and vanished through the doorway with her.

There were several seconds of still, ringing silence after Jasper and Alice dragged the girl through the trees before anyone reacted. In a breath, though, Carlisle was standing directly in front of Bella and her father.

"Bella you cut too deep," he said quickly, extending her arm and looking at the gash she had made. Carlisle quickly placed his palm against it and squeezed her arm, raising it so the injured part was above her head.

"Charlie, look at me."

Carlisle's attention was entirely focused on Charlie, who was wide eyed and hyperventilating next to her. Suddenly, she realized why he was putting off working on her arm.

Charlie obeyed him after a moment, staring at him with a terrified expression. "Slow, deep breaths Charlie. Calm down, please." Carlisle took deliberately slow breaths then, and Charlie mimicked him. "Close your eyes, focus on your breathing. You need to slow your heart down." His attention turned to Sam then. "In my office upstairs there's a black leather bag on the top shelf of the closet, bring that down here please."

Sam nodded and jogged up the stairs, returning moments later with the bag in question. Just as he appeared back in the room, Jasper shot through the door. Carlisle turned and gave him a mild look of surprise before returning his attention to Sam and Charlie.

"Good, thank you," he said to Sam. "Lay Charlie down on the couch please, I need to give him a sedative." In one smooth motion, Sam scooped Charlie up and carried him over, laying him gently on the longest couch in the room.

"Jasper, in my bag there should be three full syringes in a small plastic case. I need you to administer one to Charlie, I'm busy over here." Jasper nodded and did as Carlisle bade him, leaving him free to bring Bella over to the same loveseat they had been occupying earlier.

It was with quick, sure fingers that he stretched her arm out over his lap and finally released his grip. He worked smoothly as he cleaned the blood off her arm and his hand, repeating the same process from her birthday.

"Well," Carlisle said after a moment. "Certainly an effective way to distract her. I'd like to be upset with you, but in all reality the diversion was necessary." He sounded rueful.

"Carlisle," Billy said suddenly. Carlisle looked up quickly, obviously having been too distracted to remember the Quileute mens' presence. "Should we stay for a while, or can we leave?"

The words themselves could have been sarcastic, but the tone implied an honest question. "You should be able to go home if you wish, Alice will handle the situation appropriately. I'm terribly sorry for what happened," he said, regret thick in his voice.

"Things happen Carlisle," Billy said. If Bella didn't know better, she would almost say it sounded like Billy was comforting Carlisle. But that couldn't be…

"You can't see these things coming. You did your best, and you were ready and willing to give your life for us. I owe you not only the lives of my closest friends, but that of the chief of my tribe and my own son as well. It is not something any of us will forget." Billy's words rang with gratitude and sincerity, and suddenly it made sense to her. Carlisle had told Sam and Jacob to stay back from the fight and guard the rest of them, specifically instructed them not to get involved with the fight unless the girl took him down. He had been willing to lose his life to protect them, rather than let them help and risk their safety. It was a move that no father could ever ignore.

"I could never have asked them to join that fight if they'd had another choice," Carlisle told him.

"That's a good thing too," Jasper cut in. "Newborns are lethal, and you have to know what you're doing when fighting them. If not," he paused, "your death will be so fast you may not even notice it. The strength of a vampire in their first year is absolutely unparalleled. Even the strongest of us have nothing on the strength of a newborn."

Billy took a long look at Jacob, and shuddered visibly. "Thank you, all of you."

With that, the three elder Quileutes left, leaving Sam and Jacob in the living room with Carlisle, Bella, Charlie and Jasper, who was silently watching Carlisle stitch Bella's arm.

"Where's Alice?" Carlisle asked Jasper.

"Hunting with the girl," he responded. "She was too thirsty, it's been a few weeks. I just hunted yesterday, so I just caught a coyote along the way back here." Jasper glanced at Bella uncertainly, and she saw the regret in his eyes.

"It's great to see you Jasper," she told him. "I've missed you." Jasper could feel the emotions around her, and he could tell she was being sincere. He couldn't find the slightest bit of fear, anger, distrust or disgust anywhere in her, and it lightened his heart.

"I've missed you too," he said honestly. "And I'm sorry about what happened last time," he told her softly. He could tell she didn't blame him, and he would know it even if he weren't an empath, but he still needed to say it.

"I don't blame you in the least Jasper," she said softly. "It's not your fault, it never was."

He smiled, obviously relieved. "Thank you Bella. You have no idea how much it means to hear that."

"Well, you're all done," Carlisle told her. She turned, and he had a cautious look in his eyes.

"Thank you," she said softly. "Are you okay?"

He smiled at her question. "Only you would ask, Bella. But yes, I am absolutely perfect, now I know you are safe."


	17. Chapter 17

Neither Alice nor the mysterious newcomer said a word to each other until after they had finished hunting. It was obvious the girl was thirsty, she hadn't hesitated when they came on the herd of elk as Alice had expected her to. Clearly, it had been much longer than Alice had thought since she had hunted last.

It took longer for the girl to sate her thirst than it did Alice, and she pondered the events of the last few hours while she watched. She and Jasper had been wandering their way back home through woods and wilderness, without a date or time in mind when the vision had struck her out of absolutely nowhere. The vision hadn't been detailed enough to know who the girl was or what the motivation might have been. All she had seen was a strange vampire attempting to attack while Carlisle was with the Quileute men, Charlie and Bella.

Alice shook her head in confusion. She and Jasper had been spending a few weeks to themselves, and so she hadn't been trying to see anything. Once she got back she would have to ask Carlisle to catch her up on what had been happening lately. There was something going on that included not only the Quileutes, but Charlie as well. Clearly, Charlie was in on something, though she didn't know how much, and that worried her. If the Volturi were to find out…

She let the thought trail off for later as the girl let yet another elk fall to the ground at her feet without chasing after the herd again. Finally, it seemed, she was satisfied. Alice smiled wryly. Ah, the newborn year. Combine that with the fact she had obviously not fed for a while, and it was little wonder that she was so thirsty. With a resigned sigh, Alice darted to the girl's side. Before she went home, she had to deal with this situation one way or another.

"Hey, are you-" Alice began, before being cut off.

"What's with the elk? Why are we hunting them and not humans?" The girl's voice was frantic, and Alice was on the verge of answering when the girl - she would really have to ask a name - whirled around to look at her. All previous thoughts left Alice's mind when she saw the girl's eyes.

"You're not a newborn!" She exclaimed. The only response she got was a confused look. Clearly, she didn't understand the terminology. "You weren't changed recently," Alice explained. "You're older, years old. How long ago were you turned?"

"Six years, almost exactly. Something like that, I try not to think about it." Her tone was heartbreakingly sad, dejected in a way that confused Alice. It was obvious she was one who hated what she was.

"Well what's your name?"

"Eliza. Eliza Varraso. But that doesn't matter. What's with the animals?" Something about feeding from animals was important to her, though Alice had no idea what it could be.

"Personal preference I guess," she said. She hadn't ever really, truly thought about the reasons behind it before. For Alice, at least, it had just always been what she did. It was Carlisle's chosen way of life, and she followed it without question. Add that to the benefit of giving Jasper peace, and she didn't really need her own personal reason for it.

"How often do you kill animals instead? How long can we live on them before we have to kill a human again?" Eliza's voice was frantic, edging toward hysteria.

"Indefinitely, so far. Carlisle was turned in the seventeenth century and he's never fed on a human, neither has my sister Rosalie."

Eliza looked at Alice with a mixture of shock, pain and relief, but mostly shock. As with most, the idea had never even occurred to her. "We don't have to kill humans?" Came the hushed whisper. "We can survive on animals forever?" The girl's eyes were huge, and Alice frowned slightly at the response. She had thought the girl was worried about the difference in nutritional value, if it would affect her negatively to drink from animals. She was obviously mistaken, but she wasn't sure where the girl was going with this yet.

"No," she said, trying to be soothing through her confusion. Gently, she rested her hands on Eliza's shoulders, attempting to comfort her. "Carlisle, the one you fought with, has never killed a human. When he couldn't kill himself, he tried to starve himself instead. He was hilding out in the wilderness so no one would find him, and attacked a herd of deer one day. He's never turned back."

Eliza's eyes widened to nearly the size of quarters, and her hands came up to cover her mouth. "I don't have to..." came a hushed, incomplete whisper. Alice gave up trying to understand what could possibly be going through the girl's mind, and settled on comforting her instead.

She wrapped her tiny arms around the other girl, pulling her head down to her shoulder as Eliza began to sob hysterically. Silently, Alice cursed Edward for running off to South America, wishing she knew why the poor thing was reacting this way. Alice settled herself for combing her fingers through Eliza's waist length, rich auburn ringlets as she waited for her to cry herself out.

Eliza cried for a long time before finally purging herself of whatever sorrow had claimed her. Sobs turned to gasping breaths, and finally to silence, before either one spoke again.

"Are you okay now?" Alice asked gently, concern coloring her voice. It shocked Alice when she pulled back and truly looked at Eliza for the first time how young she was. She couldn't have been more than seventeen when she was turned.

"Getting there," came the shaky reply. "I'm sorry about that. I thought I was cursed, forced to murder people, to treat them as food for the rest of eternity... Finding out there's another way..." Eliza shook her head, lost for words.

"I thought it was Hell," she continued after a moment. "I thought I'd been damned to Hell for what I did to Rachel..."

"Who is Rachel?" Alice asked quickly. "What do you mean?" Alice looked up into the trees, searching for somewhere more secluded. Fifty feet above them she spotted a thick bough, concealed almost completely by the surrounding branches. A foot up and three inches over was a thinner branch protruding from the same tree, almost a makeshift bench. Though neither of them needed to sit, it was more casual, better suited to the conversation she felt was coming.

Of course, she could have looked for it, but something stopped her. For one of very few times since she had woken a vampire, she didn't want to see the story in a vision. She wanted to really hear it.

"Come on, lets talk up there." Alice led the way up the tree, seating herself nimbly on the bough and leaning back casually against the second. Eliza sat next to her, looking out at the surrounding trees in silence. Alice waited patiently for her to answer the questions she had posed.

With a heavy sigh, Eliza began to talk. "February sixteenth, six years ago, I was with my friend Rachel after school. I was making us sandwiches, and I decided to play a joke on her. She was a really picky eater, we both were, and there were a lot of things neither of us would eat. Peanut butter was one of the ones I liked, but she said she hated it. I loved it, and I always tried to get her to eat some.

"I thought it would be funny to put some on her sandwich, just to watch her face. She always made hilarious faces when she ate something she didn't like," Eliza remembered with a sad smile. "So I put some on, just a teaspoon, so I could watch her face. It was something we did to each other a lot, she always laughed about it afterwards, both of us did. So I gave it to her and she didn't hesitate, just bit right in.

"I could see it in her face when she realized what I'd done, it took her until the second bite to notice the taste. I was waiting for her to make a face like she always did, but she didn't. She dropped it and put a finger in her mouth, trying to vomit, but it was too late." Alice tugged her close as she heard her voice start to shake again.

"She never told me she was allergic to nuts," Eliza whispered brokenly.


	18. Chapter 18

"Oh honey," Alice whispered, lost for any more words than that. She could swear she felt her heart literally break in her chest.

"I spent every day asking for forgiveness," she continued in the same broken whisper. "I didn't even know who I was asking, I just wanted it to feel like someone forgave me, I didn't mean to kill her. I swear I didn't, I had no idea she was allergic, she always just said she didn't like it. I know it's my fault, but it was still an accident. I was hoping that maybe someone, something would reach out somehow and tell me I was forgiven, but nothing ever did…"

Alice's mouth dropped open in horror as she made the final connection. "And then you were transformed into one of us…"

Eliza nodded, breath hitching as she began to cry again. "April 7th," she confirmed. "When I woke up, I was in some alleyway in the bad part of town, and a homeless guy was right there, he must have come over to see why I was screaming so much. I attacked him without thinking, I had no idea what I was doing but I couldn't stop. I didn't even realize what I'd done, what I'd turned into until he was drained.

"I ran away, off into the woods and the mountains. I couldn't believe what I'd done, but it made sense in a twisted way. I just figured I'd been damned for murdering her, that this was my punishment. I was so horrified by what I did to her, I thought that this was the price. Because every time I kill someone, I remember it all over again. It reminds me what I did, what I am…"

"Sweetheart, if this is Hell then they're not doing a very good job. I don't remember anything of my human life, but from what I've heard, I'd say that my time as a human was hell, if anything was. I woke up, I didn't remember anything, I had no idea what was going on, who I was,  _what_  I was. The only thing I remembered was my name, Alice. That's all I had.

"But then I had a vision," she continued, smiling softly. "I saw Jasper, the one I was with earlier, and I knew without a doubt, that  _somehow_ we would find each other, that we would be together. I had a vision of Carlisle, and the rest of the family. I saw myself and Jasper finding them, joining them, and I saw their way, _our way_  of life. And I knew everything would be okay.

"This isn't Hell, Eliza, and it isn't a punishment. It's just a twist in your life, an unexpected card in the deck. All you have to do is decide what to do with it. We can help you with that, if you want us to. You can stay with us."

Eliza nodded gratefully. "I'd like that," she whispered.

...

Bella sat on Carlisle's lap in the living room, with her head resting on his shoulder and his hand wrapped around the bandage on her arm to soothe the burning. She was exhausted, but the events of the evening had her too keyed up to sleep just yet. Charlie was luckier, he was still out cold on the other sofa. Carlisle said he would probably sleep until morning.

Sam had left almost immediately after the older men, and Jacob had stuck around long enough to talk to her about the wolf thing briefly. It hadn't been a long conversation, just a quick confirmation of her memory. He'd said he would explain more another time, when she was up to it, before he left also.

"How are you feeling?" Carlisle asked softly.

"Jittery. I feel like I should still be shaking even though I'm exhausted."

"I'm sorry you had to see that," he whispered. She could hear the regret in his tone, and it pained her.

"It wasn't her that scared me, not really. I knew she would never get to any of us. For a few seconds there, I thought..."

"You thought she would kill me," Carlisle finished for her. She nodded into his neck, and he hugged her tighter. He was torn between feeling sad that she had been scared, and glad that she had been worried about losing  _him._  "I'm here, Bella, and I am completely unharmed."

"I know," she said. "It was just hard, seeing that." He felt her good arm tighten around his waist and relished the feeling. Jasper sat in the recliner, watching T.V. with what was obviously limited interest. He had called Emmett earlier, telling him that he and Alice were back to stay. Emmett's response had been typical of Emmett, a cheer followed by the promise that they would be home soon. Carlisle fretted a bit over Rosalie's reaction to his newfound closeness with Bella, but shoved it to the back of his mind.

Jasper's head turned to the glass wall suddenly, and Carlisle heard the sound of two vampires running through the forest. He shared a look of confusion with Jasper, wondering why Alice was bringing the girl back when she knew Charlie and Bella were probably going to still be there.

"She feels calm" Jasper said. "They both do, I don't think the girl is a newborn after all."

"It must have been an extraordinarily long time since she's fed, if she's mature."

Jasper nodded in agreement just as Alice and the girl shot through the trees and leapt the river in a single bound. Bella followed their gazes, and he saw when her eyes found Alice and the newcomer in the moonlight. In the next breath, they were through the door, and Alice was sitting next to him, with her arms wrapped around Bella and himself.

"I missed you so much!" She squealed in delight. Bella removed her arm from around him to hug Alice tightly, and he put an arm around her as well. Carlisle's eyes shifted to the newcomer, who he could see was not a newborn, as Jasper had guessed. She was several years old, but less than ten, he thought.

Alice got up and flitted over to her, guiding her by the hand to stand in front of them. Carlisle stood, setting Bella down gently as he did so.

"I'm Carlisle," he introduced, holding out his hand. She grasped it tentatively, looking wary.

"I'm Eliza," she returned. "And I'm so sorry about earlier, I was trying to stay out in the woods where I wouldn't come across any humans and there was a breeze. I smelled him," she pointed to Charlie, "and I just lost it, it'd been so long since I... fed," she finished reluctantly.

Carlisle missed neither the reluctant way she said fed, nor the way Alice's arm squeezed her shoulders in reassurance. Another who felt the way he did, or so it seemed.

"How long?" Came Jasper's query. Her eyes shifted to him, and she tensed automatically. He couldn't quite hide his smile, it was a common response among their kind. The bite marks that marred his skin made him stand out like a billboard, to them at least.

"This is my son, Jasper," he said quickly, hoping to alleviate her fear. Eliza glanced to him briefly and relaxed before answering Jasper.

"Seven months I think? Longer than I've ever been able to go before anyway, my record before that was five."

The shock was tangible throughout the room, he could tell that even Bella was stunned. "Why so long?" He asked in a hushed voice.

Her eyes went to the floor, and Alice cut in instead. "We can talk later. But I told her that she could stay with us," Alice told him. He nodded in agreement, he knew that Alice would have explained everything already. If she had needed to, anyway. He could tell that much like himself, this girl hated the idea of taking human lives.

Carlisle stepped forward and smiled at Eliza warmly, placing his hands on her shoulders. She looked up at him in surprise, but didn't pull away. She had been a loner, he could see it in her eyes, along with something like hope. She was also very young, fifteen or sixteen, and small. Slender, and just over five feet tall, but still several inches taller than Alice.

"Eliza, I would be delighted to call you my daughter," he told her sincerely. He saw a small smile form on her lips, before she wrapped her slender arms around his waist.

"Thank you," came her whispered acceptance.

Carlisle's heart warmed at the idea. She was so young, and it was obvious she had endured far too much pain in her short life. The rest of his family called him their father more for convenience's sake, none of them truly needed him as children needed a parent.

He could tell, though, that Eliza would be different. She would need him as a father and a mentor, she needed parents in a way none of the others did, so he would do his best to be that for her. He would also call Esme. Split or not, she was as much a part of their family as the rest, and Carlisle knew that she would be aching to care for Eliza, to give her the love and acceptance she so desperately needed.


	19. Chapter 19

Eliza introduced herself briefly to Bella, but it was obvious to everyone that after the events of the day she just needed some peace and quiet, so Alice led her up the stairs to the room she shared with Jasper. At some point, Carlisle knew he would have to get her story, but tonight wasn't the night for that.

His attention returned to Bella, who was obviously exhausted. She was curled up on the loveseat, barely able to keep her eyes open. It was a mark of just how exhausted she was that when he bent down to scoop her up she didn't protest, simply rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. He spared a glance to Charlie, and winced slightly at the way he was cramped on the couch. It was plenty long enough, but perhaps too thin to sleep comfortably on.

"Jasper, could you bring Charlie upstairs to Rose and Emmett's room?" Jasper nodded and picked up Charlie carefully, doing his best not to wake him, and flitted up the stairs. Carlisle barely heard a shift in his breathing as Jasper laid him down.

"He's fine Bella," Carlisle said, interpreting her worried expression correctly. "The sedative has worn off now, he's just sleeping. Probably the best night's sleep he'll have had in a long time," he commented with a grin.

Carlisle carried Bella up the stairs to his own room, passing Jasper in the hall as he brought Charlie's clothes to the laundry room. Carlisle smiled at Jasper, happy that his adopted son had come so far from the horrors of his past. Carlisle didn't need to see Jasper's or Peter's memories the way Edward did to know how far Jasper had come. To him, it was evident just by comparing his memories of the day he showed up to how he behaved now.

He could feel Bella's eyes on his face, watching his every move, refusing to fall asleep though he could hear in her heartbeat and the flow of her blood how far beyond exhausted she was. It had been an early morning to start the day, and it was after two in the morning now. He settled Bella on his bed, laying down next to her and pulling her close the way he did every night.

"Sleep Bella," he whispered softly. "You're exhausted, let yourself rest. I promise you're safe."

She shook her head slightly. "That's not what I'm worried about. I know I'm safe with you Carlisle," she told him gently. He was surprised by the alertness in her gaze, given her tiredness. It was evident she was keeping herself awake by sheer force of will. Something must be important to her, to keep herself awake this way when she needed to sleep.

"What then?"

"Esme is coming back?" She asked tentatively. He could hear the slightest bit of self consciousness, of nervousness, in her tone, but he could tell that wasn't what was prominent in her mind right then.

"Yes, I'll be calling her tomorrow. I believe Eliza needs a mother right now, more than any of the others ever did. How could I deny either of them the opportunity?"

Bella smiled, she knew Esme would love the opportunity to smother Eliza with love and comfort. "And Edward will come with her, won't he?"

The thought hadn't occurred to him yet, and he froze when he realized she was right. More than likely, Edward  _would_ return with Esme. His heart constricted in his chest, and he fought to keep the pain from his face as he realized what it could mean. Carlisle held his breath, refusing to exhale until he was sure it wouldn't come out as a sob.

Bella's fingers traced lightly over his face, and he had no words for how it felt to him to be touched by her this way. Swallowing heavily, Carlisle fought to keep his voice even as he answered her query.

"I believe he will. It wouldn't be fair to ask him to stay away," Carlisle told her, somewhat stiffly. He didn't mean to be short with her, but he could barely breathe through the pain in his heart. She would go back to Edward, he was sure of it. He was nothing more than a convenience, a friendly face. She had said that she could fall in love with him easily, and he knew she had been telling the truth. But that would never, could never compete when she was already in love with Edward.

Carlisle chastised himself quickly. She was meant for Edward, he deserved her companionship and she his. He would keep his thoughts, his pain, to himself as much as he was able. He would not steal away her happiness, even if it killed him in the process.

Belatedly, he became aware of Bella tugging on his arm, nearly shouting his name in an attempt to get his attention. Cursing himself for freezing up and showing weakness in such a way, he responded to her.

"I'm sorry Bella," he apologized quickly. "I didn't mean to be short with you. I just handn't thought of that is all." He sucked in a breath, and the words that came out burned worse than the venom through his human veins. "I'm sure he will be ecstatic to see you," he told her honestly. It was a lost cause to keep the pain from his face or out of his voice, but he tried anyway. He could tell it was in vain by the look in her eyes.

"Carlisle," she whispered to him, "that doesn't matter to me. That's not why I'm asking." Bella pulled herself into a sitting position on his lap, and his arms wound around her instinctively. Every moment, every touch they shared this way felt so fundamentally right that it was hard to focus on anything else when she awarded him such contact.

"Carlisle," she breathed once more, reclaiming his attention. "I'm not going to go back to Edward."

His breathing stopped as he considered her words. She wasn't? Clearly, the question was written all over his face, and it didn't surprise him in the least.

"A part of me still loves him, and probably always will. I'm not going to lie to you about that. I'm not going to lie and say I'm healed, that I'm ready for something serious yet."

Carlisle was staring at her, trying to convince himself she wasn't taking this where he so desperately wanted her to be. It took every part of his well trained control to hold himself still, to sit and listen to her calmly when he wanted nothing more than to kiss her, to close the distance and hold her, to love her and make love  _to_  her in every way he knew how.

"But watching you fight her tonight," she continued after a moment. Truly, she was excellent at reading when he zoned out. "It showed me just how much you mean to me. I'm not ready to jump in with both feet, not yet," and his mind seemed to fous soley on the 'yet', "but Carlisle..." She paused, leaning closer to him in the break of silence between her words, "I love you."

Her hands caressed the back of his neck, and so caught up in his own internal joy was he that he didn't even notice her lean in until her soft, warm lips pressed themselves on his own. One hand wrapped around her waist like a vice as the other buried itself in her hair, kissing her back gently but with a passion she had never seen or felt before.

Carlisle released the breath locked in his lungs, and it came out hitched and strangled, in stops and starts and he realized he was actually crying, all out crying for the first time since he had taken down the first deer, so many years ago.

Such was the emotion that he had to pull back from her, and though the loss of her lips against his was nearly unbearable now he knew she wanted him as well, he couldn't stop the sobs once they started. His hand fell from her hair to her ribs, a small part of his brain keeping tabs on his strength as he clutched her. The hands at his neck drew his head to her shoulder, where he let go a multitude of emotions so mixed together he couldn't tell one from another.

She held him all the while, through the uncontrollable, tearless sobs and the gasps that followed, until finally he was spent. He waited for embarassment to burn through him at the thought of his own weakness, but it never came, even when she drew his chin up to look at him once more.

He cradled her face gently in his hands, leaning forward until their foreheads touched. His lips brushed hers once, twice, thrice, before he spoke in return.

"And I love you, more than you could ever imagine."


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again everyone! Just a couple of things here before we get started.
> 
> First off, I've had several people asking if Bella is Carlisle's mate, and I wanted to clarify that in my interpretation of the series, they don't have one particular mate meant for them. In my definition, a vampire's mate simply refers to them being together, as the idea of them having one mate meant for them would go along with the idea of soulmates, which frankly, I don't believe in. But given that when a vampire truly falls in love, it is permanent, I feel that using the term mate still applies. I simply don't use it in the context of there being one person and one person only meant for everyone in the world.
> 
> Second, I know a good number of you are expecting Edward to flip out when he discovers Carlisle and Bella are a couple. Personally, I don't think he would lose his mind and be out of his mind pissed, and I base this off his conversations both with Jacob and about Jacob in Eclipse, where he states that he would let her go, if it came to it. I know that it's bound to be different because it is Carlisle, but I hope that I explained that well enough in the story itself.

Emmett and Rosalie arrived back at the house at about three thirty in the morning, with Alice cuffing Emmett upside the head to quiet him, telling him that there were humans trying to sleep. Their introduction to Eliza was quiet and brief, as Eliza was still wanting some space. After being alone for six years, the sudden company was still jarring for her. There was a guest room at the end of the hall that was never touched that had been set up for Eliza and Esme to share, neither of them having a mate.

Carlisle went to Emmett and Rosalie's room at seven thirty when he heard Charlie's heartbeat change, wanting to be there when he woke up. It was evident in Charlie's expression that the memory of the previous evening was hazy, along with the disorientation from not recognizing the room he was in.

"How are you feeling Charlie?" Carlisle asked tentatively.

He considered for a moment. "Sluggish. What happened last night? And where the hell am I?"

"It's a long story, but the short version is we have a new member of the family for as long as she wants to be here, her name is Eliza. As for your other question, this is Emmett and Rosalie's room. I had Jasper administer a sedative to you last night, I'm not sure if you remember that part?"

"Vaguely," Charlie said slowly.

Carlisle nodded to himself. "Good. You were too worked up and I needed to get your heart rate down. I knew you would be out through the night, so I had Jasper bring you up here. He took the liberty of changing you and washing your clothes at the same time," Carlisle told him, gesturing to the folded clothes on a chair in the corner.

"So whose are these?" He asked Carlisle, gesturing to the lounge pants he had been dressed in.

"Those are Jasper's." Charlie grunted in response, evidently still feeling on the slow side.

"Well, er, thanks," he said uncertainly. "How's Bella?"

"Still asleep, she was up until around two, so I'm not expecting her to be awake for another few hours. Feel free to use the shower as well, the bathroom should be fully stocked." His lips quirked up in a grin, "Just steer clear of anything that looks feminine and you'll be fine. Emmett won't care, but Rose is a bit more... particular."

Charlie grinned and nodded, understanding. Even if Bella wasn't as fussy as some girls, he still understood. Renée had been particularly obsessive, back in their married days at least.

"Thanks for everything," Charlie told him once more. "I'll be alright, I'm sure you're wanting to get back to Bella."

Carlisle ducked his head slightly in embarrassment, before nodding and leaving the room. He could hear Emmett laughing quietly downstairs, and shook his head as he made his way back to his own room, intending to lay with Bella until she woke. His plans were thwarted, however, by Rosalie, who was waiting in front of the door.

Carlisle cursed to himself as he realized she would have caught Charlie's remark and put two and two together. Figuring it would be best to just get it overwith, he jerked his head in the direction of his office. In the next moment, Rosalie was through the door, and he winced. Impatience was never a good sign. Feeling like he was headed for the gallows of his human youth, Carlisle joined her, closing the door softly behind him.

Turning to her, he spoke. "Just say it Rose."

"You and Bella?" She asked immediately, with a thin veil of forced calm. He appreciated the effort, it was something he hadn't expected.

He nodded. "She said she needs time to heal, but we've talked, and it's something we both want. It wasn't something either of us expected, but I have come to love her very much, more so than I ever did Esme. I see that she was right to suggest we end things, now that I've come to love Bella this way."

"And Edward?"

Carlisle sighed heavily. "I've been thinking about it through the night, and I've come to realize that I don't think Edward loves her the way he thinks he does." Rose showed every sign of interrupting, but he cut her off. "Hear me out Rose, please. When you've talked about your human fiancé, you say that you were young and in love with..."

He left the end of the phrase open for her to finish, as he knew she would.

"With the... idea of love," she said quietly. He could see the recognition in her face, and the agreement as well. "And you think Edward is the same?"

"Given that he was able to leave, and for so long, I believe so. I'm hoping so."

Carlisle heard the whisper of footsteps, and Jasper stood in the doorway.

"Jasper, you have something to add?" Carlisle asked.

"I agree with you," Jasper told him simply. "Edward was very fond of her, obviously. But I never picked up any of the passion that vampires normally have for their mates. It always felt much like you and Esme, to be perfectly honest. With Edward and Bella or you and Esme, it never was half as strong as what Emmett and Rose feel, or Peter and Charlotte, or Alice and I."

"And how do you think Edward will fare, after this?" Carlisle asked softly. It was the one question he dreaded getting an answer to. He didn't want to hear that Edward would suffer, pine for his lost love for the rest of his existence. Carlisle would never be able to forgive himself if that were the case.

"Once he's finished his stubborn moping and accepted that it's not a possibility, he'll get over it."

Carlisle breathed a sigh of relief. He knew Jasper was right, in that Edward would be stubborn for a while. It would take him time to truly accept that Bella wasn't coming back to him. But once he accepted his, it seemed, he would heal.

"She meant it, by the way," Jasper said suddenly. Carlisle gave him a look of confusion in response, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Rosalie flit out of the room, closing the door behind her. Of course, they would still hear, but the illusion was comforting.

"What Bella said last night," Jasper clarified. "I could feel your doubt. She meant it, I promise you that."

"Thank you Jasper. You're right, I was wondering. She was so tired last night, I couldn't help it."

"Well she was awake enough for that. And even though he gives you a hard time, Charlie approves." Jasper grinned then. "Last I heard, every dad wanted their daughter to marry a doctor."

Carlisle laughed aloud then, smiling in relief now that he knew Charlie didn't secretly resent him for falling for his daughter.

"When I call Esme later, I'm planning on asking Edward to meet out in the forest, away from the house so we can talk. Would you come with? I think it would be beneficial for him if you showed him what you explained to me."

Jasper nodded in agreement. "Yes, I can do that. I know you're expecting him to be angry, but in truth, I'm not so sure."

"How so?"

"Above all, he wants her to be happy. If I can show him beyond a doubt that she's happy with you, I think he'll back down without much of a fight."

"If it were anyone else, I would agree. But I'm afraid he'll feel as though I betrayed him," Carlisle confessed sadly.

"He'll be hurt, but he has more respect for you than that. He knows you would never deliberately hurt him. And he also knows that you would never keep something important from him. And this is all in addition to the fact he has full access to the inside of your head," Jasper finished with a wry smile. "He'll be upset, but I doubt he'll blame you, or Bella or any of us. He's the one who left her, and he knows that."

Carlisle could hear the truth of Jasper's words, but the self conscious, pessimistic side of him didn't want to believe him. And maybe a twisted part of him wanted Edward to be angry, because in a way he felt he deserved it...

"Don't go down that road Carlisle," Jasper chastised sharply. "Edward made the choice to leave, you did the smart thing and came to see how she was doing. I didn't see her, but I saw Alice after she had visions about Bella. You did the right thing, coming back here for her. You saved her life. You can't be faulted for falling in love along the way. And if Edward decides to be stubborn, I'll make sure he knows it."

Carlisle nodded gratefully. It was good for him to have Jasper around, as he had a tendency to doubt himself.

"On another note," Carlisle started, changing the subject, "I'm quite proud of you." Jasper gave him a confused look. "You stayed in the room last night, while Bella was bleeding. Quite profusely, I might add."

"I've been working on it," Jasper answered. "The... shame, I felt that night, after I came to my senses..." He shook his head slightly. "It was the worst I've felt since I left the south. I never wanted to feel like that again. I was sure the separation from Bella was temporary, and I was determined to never let something like that happen again. So yes, I've been working extremely hard. I'm glad it paid off."

Carlisle grinned and walked forward, embracing his son. He let his happiness and pride glow brightly, knowing that feeling the emotions would mean more to Jasper than any words ever could.

"I always knew you had it in you," Carlisle told him confidently. And he had. Carlisle knew that one day, Jasper would find it in himself to control his thirst. And now the day had come, he couldn't be more proud.

...

Carlisle returned to the bedroom, laying down carefully next to Bella and admiring her as she slept. Charlie had left while he was speaking with Jasper and Rosalie, and now he replayed the last night in his head over and over, unable to help the grin it brought. The minutes drug by, but finally he heard her heartbeat and breathing shift with her slow return to consciousness. When her eyelids fluttered and opened, the first thing her gaze locked on was him.

She smiled and stretched with a quiet groan before wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling herself close to him, sighing deeply as his arms wound around her in return. He let his fingers thread softly through her hair as he held her, almost unable to believe she really did love him.

She rolled on to her back after several minutes, stretching again and relaxing as he watched her. Laying on one side, he hovered half way over her, one hand caressing the side of her face as he looked at her questioningly. She smiled at him again before cupping the back of his neck and tugging him lightly toward her.

Carlisle didn't hesitate, lowering himself and meeting her kiss soundly, relishing the sensation and hoping that she would be open to this more often now.

She hadn't pulled back yet, and Carlisle took advantage of the opportunity, cautiously tracing her lips with his tongue. Her breath caught and her tongue grazed his lightly, accepting him as he deepened their kiss. He shifted his weight to hover over her completely, lowering himself until he could feel her body along the length of his own, but not so much that she bore any of his weight.

One of his hands traced its way down her body, grazing her waist as it came to rest on her hip. He could hear the pounding of her heart as she kissed him, and he swore it was the sweetest sound he had ever heard. It also seemed to act as a cue to the rest of the house, as a separate part of his brain registered the sound of their exit.

Her kissing grew more passionate, as well as erratic and he responded in kind, channeling all of his pent up desire and longing into the kiss they were finally able to share. She had a hand fisted tightly in his hair, the other wrapped securely around his lower back as though she never intended to let him go. Carlisle made to lift his hips slightly as his arousal grew more prominent, but her arm tightened as she arched herself to meet him.

With a groan of surrender, he pressed his erection firmly against her abdomen, growling low in his chest as he fought to keep his instincts in check. One of her legs lifted to wrap around his hips, and the movement settled his erection directly between her thighs. He felt her leg flex, and though she was not strong enough to move him herself, he let his body be guided by the movement, rolling his erection carefully against her throbbing flesh.

Bella moaned deep in her throat and he repeated the motion, rocking himself in a gentle rhythm as she broke from his lips, tilting her head back and panting his name in a broken whisper. Her other leg wound around his hips, muscles flexing in an effort to press him more firmly against her.

Her moans grew louder, and she bit her lip to hold them back, not knowing they had the house to themselves.

"They're gone," he whispered huskily in her ear. "Let me hear you Bella."

At his words, or perhaps the feel of his lips grazing her ear, she shuddered, and Carlisle upped his pace, angling a hand between them to apply extra pressure and friction to himself as he stroked against her. He pressed her down against the bed, thrusting firmly and sharply against her, drawing her closer to her climax with each stroke of his hips.

Unexpectedly, a slender, warm hand found its way into the waistband of his sweatpants and grazed against the tip of his erection, making his hips jerk spasmodically. The sudden pressure against her sent her over the edge, and she cried out sharply as her release washed over her. He met each throb of her pulse with a quick, steady thrust, and the sensation of that same warm finger brushing against him again triggered his own release.

Carlisle grunted and moaned sharply in her ear as he climaxed, coming down from his own pleasure as she did hers.

Though he didn't need the air, he panted with her as they recovered. Guilt began to wash through him as he realized he may have pushed things too far, but the gentle smile on her face stopped him before he could get a good mental chastisement going.

"I know I said I didn't want to go too fast," she said with a light chuckle, "but I could get used to this."

He laughed in relief, glad she wasn't upset with him for pushing things too far. "I love you Bella."

"I love you too Carlisle," she told him softly. He doubted that his reaction to those words would ever be anything less than sheer amazement.


End file.
